WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.824 align:middle line:90% [SYNTHESIZED CHIMES] 00:00:03.824 --> 00:00:11.010 align:middle line:90% 00:00:11.010 --> 00:00:11.520 align:middle line:90% Welcome. 00:00:11.520 --> 00:00:12.280 align:middle line:90% Hi, everybody. 00:00:12.280 --> 00:00:14.170 align:middle line:90% Thank you for being here today. 00:00:14.170 --> 00:00:15.600 align:middle line:90% My name is Rebecca Trawick. 00:00:15.600 --> 00:00:17.460 align:middle line:84% I'm the director curator of the Wignall 00:00:17.460 --> 00:00:19.350 align:middle line:90% Museum at 性视界. 00:00:19.350 --> 00:00:21.510 align:middle line:84% Thank you for joining us in today's artist talk, 00:00:21.510 --> 00:00:23.610 align:middle line:84% featuring Eric Tenorio, presented 00:00:23.610 --> 00:00:26.520 align:middle line:84% as part of Collective Care, Uncovering Identity 00:00:26.520 --> 00:00:29.100 align:middle line:84% and in honor of a Day Without Art. 00:00:29.100 --> 00:00:31.890 align:middle line:84% Collective Care, Uncovering Identity is a collaborative 00:00:31.890 --> 00:00:34.770 align:middle line:84% series of programs developed by the Center for Culture 00:00:34.770 --> 00:00:37.780 align:middle line:84% and Social Justice and the Wignall Museum that bring 00:00:37.780 --> 00:00:40.590 align:middle line:84% together artists and community around issues relevant 00:00:40.590 --> 00:00:44.550 align:middle line:84% to the LGBT+ community and that look at the intersection 00:00:44.550 --> 00:00:46.680 align:middle line:90% of identity in the arts. 00:00:46.680 --> 00:00:49.170 align:middle line:84% A Day Without Art was started in 1989 00:00:49.170 --> 00:00:53.310 align:middle line:84% by Visual AIDS in response to the worsening AIDS crisis. 00:00:53.310 --> 00:00:56.190 align:middle line:84% The original goals called out for mourning and action 00:00:56.190 --> 00:00:59.670 align:middle line:84% in response to the AIDS crisis that would celebrate the lives 00:00:59.670 --> 00:01:02.460 align:middle line:84% and achievements of lost colleagues and friends 00:01:02.460 --> 00:01:05.190 align:middle line:84% and courage caring for all people with AIDS, 00:01:05.190 --> 00:01:08.070 align:middle line:84% educating diverse publics about HIV infection, 00:01:08.070 --> 00:01:11.010 align:middle line:90% and finding a cure. 00:01:11.010 --> 00:01:13.320 align:middle line:84% More than 30 years later, arts organizations 00:01:13.320 --> 00:01:15.900 align:middle line:84% take part annually to encourage education, 00:01:15.900 --> 00:01:19.290 align:middle line:84% celebration, engagement, and awareness. 00:01:19.290 --> 00:01:21.630 align:middle line:84% Please note the Wignall Museum of Contemporary Art 00:01:21.630 --> 00:01:24.840 align:middle line:84% aims to present diverse, innovative programming that 00:01:24.840 --> 00:01:27.840 align:middle line:84% engages contemporary subjects, social issues, 00:01:27.840 --> 00:01:29.520 align:middle line:90% and artistic themes. 00:01:29.520 --> 00:01:31.350 align:middle line:84% Sometimes presentations may contain 00:01:31.350 --> 00:01:33.270 align:middle line:84% provocative or otherwise sensitive 00:01:33.270 --> 00:01:35.790 align:middle line:90% content for some viewers. 00:01:35.790 --> 00:01:37.410 align:middle line:84% Before I introduce you to Eric, I 00:01:37.410 --> 00:01:40.770 align:middle line:84% want to introduce you to Dr. Letty Romo, director of Student 00:01:40.770 --> 00:01:43.410 align:middle line:84% Equity and Engagement and collaborative partner 00:01:43.410 --> 00:01:46.330 align:middle line:90% in Collective Care. 00:01:46.330 --> 00:01:49.280 align:middle line:84% I want to thank everyone for joining us today. 00:01:49.280 --> 00:01:54.820 align:middle line:84% I'm going to go ahead and read off our land acknowledgment. 00:01:54.820 --> 00:02:04.990 align:middle line:84% And-- my technology has changed a little bit, 00:02:04.990 --> 00:02:07.620 align:middle line:84% and so I'm still getting used to it. 00:02:07.620 --> 00:02:11.250 align:middle line:84% With respect and honor for the lands where 性视界 00:02:11.250 --> 00:02:13.680 align:middle line:84% resides and the leaders who came before us, 00:02:13.680 --> 00:02:15.540 align:middle line:84% we'd like to take a moment to acknowledge 00:02:15.540 --> 00:02:19.470 align:middle line:84% the Gabriele帽o-Tongva peoples, the original stewards of these 00:02:19.470 --> 00:02:21.420 align:middle line:90% sacred and unceded homelands. 00:02:21.420 --> 00:02:25.110 align:middle line:84% The Tongva people's history, languages, cultural traditions, 00:02:25.110 --> 00:02:27.540 align:middle line:84% and legacy continue to shape this region, 00:02:27.540 --> 00:02:29.580 align:middle line:84% and we recognize their continuing presence 00:02:29.580 --> 00:02:30.690 align:middle line:90% in their homelands. 00:02:30.690 --> 00:02:32.610 align:middle line:84% In the spirit of truth and equity, 00:02:32.610 --> 00:02:34.290 align:middle line:84% 性视界 commits to uplifting 00:02:34.290 --> 00:02:36.510 align:middle line:84% the voice of Indigenous peoples, building 00:02:36.510 --> 00:02:39.330 align:middle line:84% an inclusive and equitable educational environment, 00:02:39.330 --> 00:02:42.280 align:middle line:84% and decolonizing the institution. 00:02:42.280 --> 00:02:44.880 align:middle line:84% We also encourage members of the 性视界 community 00:02:44.880 --> 00:02:46.920 align:middle line:84% to learn about the land they reside on 00:02:46.920 --> 00:02:50.100 align:middle line:84% and their original caretakers and advocate for culturally 00:02:50.100 --> 00:02:52.140 align:middle line:90% responsive action. 00:02:52.140 --> 00:02:54.030 align:middle line:90% Thank you. 00:02:54.030 --> 00:02:57.510 align:middle line:84% So today, I'm very pleased to introduce artist Eric Tenorio. 00:02:57.510 --> 00:03:00.750 align:middle line:84% Eric is a SoCal-based photographer and queer HIV 00:03:00.750 --> 00:03:04.680 align:middle line:84% plus, sorry, HIV positive Filipino American. 00:03:04.680 --> 00:03:06.540 align:middle line:84% Tenorio graduated from the School 00:03:06.540 --> 00:03:08.940 align:middle line:84% of Visual Arts, SVA, in New York City 00:03:08.940 --> 00:03:11.700 align:middle line:84% after completion of his AA and photography 00:03:11.700 --> 00:03:13.560 align:middle line:90% here at 性视界. 00:03:13.560 --> 00:03:15.390 align:middle line:84% He uses his art to provoke viewers 00:03:15.390 --> 00:03:18.000 align:middle line:84% to question and confront new perspectives, 00:03:18.000 --> 00:03:20.220 align:middle line:84% to encourage discussion and understanding, 00:03:20.220 --> 00:03:22.590 align:middle line:84% and to explore different realities. 00:03:22.590 --> 00:03:25.185 align:middle line:84% Please join me in giving Eric a warm virtual welcome. 00:03:25.185 --> 00:03:27.718 align:middle line:90% 00:03:27.718 --> 00:03:28.510 align:middle line:90% Thank you, Rebecca. 00:03:28.510 --> 00:03:29.830 align:middle line:90% Thank you, Roman. 00:03:29.830 --> 00:03:31.640 align:middle line:90% Thank you, everyone. 00:03:31.640 --> 00:03:36.780 align:middle line:84% So I'm going to go ahead and share my screen. 00:03:36.780 --> 00:03:40.170 align:middle line:84% So, yes, like Rebecca said, my name is Eric Tenorio. 00:03:40.170 --> 00:03:44.580 align:middle line:90% My pronouns are he, him, his. 00:03:44.580 --> 00:03:49.410 align:middle line:90% And just a little background. 00:03:49.410 --> 00:03:51.570 align:middle line:84% Like she said, I'm a queer Filipino American. 00:03:51.570 --> 00:03:54.600 align:middle line:90% I was born and raised in SoCal. 00:03:54.600 --> 00:03:57.690 align:middle line:84% I've been doing photography now for 10 plus years. 00:03:57.690 --> 00:04:07.380 align:middle line:84% And I was diagnosed with HIV in 2012, when I was 22 years old. 00:04:07.380 --> 00:04:12.150 align:middle line:84% So I'm going to start off with discussing my work pre-HIV. 00:04:12.150 --> 00:04:16.470 align:middle line:84% And my-- the way I dealt with photography, 00:04:16.470 --> 00:04:18.300 align:middle line:84% the way I focused on my photography, 00:04:18.300 --> 00:04:19.560 align:middle line:90% before I got my status. 00:04:19.560 --> 00:04:23.160 align:middle line:90% 00:04:23.160 --> 00:04:27.870 align:middle line:84% My work was very by the assignment-- 00:04:27.870 --> 00:04:29.430 align:middle line:84% whatever the assignment was given, 00:04:29.430 --> 00:04:32.070 align:middle line:84% I would just do whatever was asked of me. 00:04:32.070 --> 00:04:34.605 align:middle line:84% There wasn't really an in-depth look of what I was doing. 00:04:34.605 --> 00:04:39.030 align:middle line:90% 00:04:39.030 --> 00:04:40.650 align:middle line:84% I was passionate about photography, 00:04:40.650 --> 00:04:43.890 align:middle line:84% but I wasn't fully invested at the time. 00:04:43.890 --> 00:04:47.700 align:middle line:84% I was just doing what I had to do to get by and get 00:04:47.700 --> 00:04:48.360 align:middle line:90% a solid grade. 00:04:48.360 --> 00:04:52.770 align:middle line:90% 00:04:52.770 --> 00:04:56.070 align:middle line:84% My work was focusing on assignments. 00:04:56.070 --> 00:04:59.460 align:middle line:84% But also, I started focusing more on myself 00:04:59.460 --> 00:05:02.850 align:middle line:84% with my self-portraits, which started as just a way 00:05:02.850 --> 00:05:05.310 align:middle line:90% to get around not using models. 00:05:05.310 --> 00:05:08.580 align:middle line:84% My professor told me to start photographing myself. 00:05:08.580 --> 00:05:11.700 align:middle line:84% I then started photographing myself because I wanted to. 00:05:11.700 --> 00:05:15.420 align:middle line:84% And then, that also just started forming 00:05:15.420 --> 00:05:20.130 align:middle line:84% my idea of my queer identity and my sense of style of my work 00:05:20.130 --> 00:05:21.750 align:middle line:90% and moving forward. 00:05:21.750 --> 00:05:25.230 align:middle line:90% 00:05:25.230 --> 00:05:28.530 align:middle line:84% When I was diagnosed with HIV when I was 22 years old, 00:05:28.530 --> 00:05:32.880 align:middle line:84% it obviously turned my world upside down. 00:05:32.880 --> 00:05:34.648 align:middle line:90% It was very jarring to me. 00:05:34.648 --> 00:05:36.690 align:middle line:84% It was something that, obviously, a lot of people 00:05:36.690 --> 00:05:39.150 align:middle line:84% think that they'll never get because 00:05:39.150 --> 00:05:42.210 align:middle line:90% of just their way of thinking. 00:05:42.210 --> 00:05:44.610 align:middle line:90% But I did get HIV when I was 22. 00:05:44.610 --> 00:05:49.650 align:middle line:84% And it really gave me a drive in my work 00:05:49.650 --> 00:05:54.930 align:middle line:84% to go forward and pursue the things I wanted to do and reach 00:05:54.930 --> 00:05:58.680 align:middle line:84% the goals that I wanted to reach, and not have anything 00:05:58.680 --> 00:05:59.820 align:middle line:90% hold me back anymore. 00:05:59.820 --> 00:06:02.810 align:middle line:90% 00:06:02.810 --> 00:06:06.950 align:middle line:84% So I started really pushing myself and my work 00:06:06.950 --> 00:06:13.300 align:middle line:84% to do ideas I never thought I would ever really do, 00:06:13.300 --> 00:06:15.970 align:middle line:84% and playing with themes of femininity, 00:06:15.970 --> 00:06:20.200 align:middle line:84% masculinity, playing with materials, 00:06:20.200 --> 00:06:21.940 align:middle line:84% and just seeing how that would go 00:06:21.940 --> 00:06:25.060 align:middle line:84% and how I really thought about it in connection with myself 00:06:25.060 --> 00:06:26.050 align:middle line:90% and my identity. 00:06:26.050 --> 00:06:34.660 align:middle line:90% 00:06:34.660 --> 00:06:38.290 align:middle line:84% So during the time of me being HIV positive, 00:06:38.290 --> 00:06:42.150 align:middle line:84% I decided to apply for the Student Invitational, which 00:06:42.150 --> 00:06:45.600 align:middle line:84% then led me into applying for SVA. 00:06:45.600 --> 00:06:48.690 align:middle line:84% So the Student Invitational was a really big way 00:06:48.690 --> 00:06:54.490 align:middle line:84% for me to really push myself to where I wanted to be 00:06:54.490 --> 00:06:56.800 align:middle line:84% and what I wanted to do with my photography. 00:06:56.800 --> 00:06:59.350 align:middle line:90% 00:06:59.350 --> 00:07:03.970 align:middle line:84% I wanted to explore my masculinity and femininity, 00:07:03.970 --> 00:07:08.880 align:middle line:84% my love for theatricality, and combining 00:07:08.880 --> 00:07:13.290 align:middle line:84% those two within the domestic setting itself 00:07:13.290 --> 00:07:18.700 align:middle line:84% and really playing around with those elements. 00:07:18.700 --> 00:07:22.720 align:middle line:84% So I would photograph myself in my house, my aunt's house. 00:07:22.720 --> 00:07:24.070 align:middle line:90% I would have my makeup done. 00:07:24.070 --> 00:07:27.010 align:middle line:84% And then, I would take these fabrics and materials 00:07:27.010 --> 00:07:28.670 align:middle line:84% that I thought were really beautiful 00:07:28.670 --> 00:07:36.490 align:middle line:84% and then wrap myself up in it or make an outfit of it, 00:07:36.490 --> 00:07:37.720 align:middle line:90% as you see. 00:07:37.720 --> 00:07:43.170 align:middle line:90% 00:07:43.170 --> 00:07:47.280 align:middle line:84% The work was really powerful to me, 00:07:47.280 --> 00:07:50.220 align:middle line:84% and it really showed people who I was as a photographer, 00:07:50.220 --> 00:07:53.370 align:middle line:84% and showed myself who I was as a photographer. 00:07:53.370 --> 00:07:56.490 align:middle line:84% Oh, I'm sorry, there is a Shark vacuum 00:07:56.490 --> 00:07:59.010 align:middle line:84% going off right now where I'm at, so hold on a second. 00:07:59.010 --> 00:08:07.560 align:middle line:90% 00:08:07.560 --> 00:08:09.712 align:middle line:90% Sorry about that. 00:08:09.712 --> 00:08:10.420 align:middle line:90% So anyways, yeah. 00:08:10.420 --> 00:08:13.030 align:middle line:84% So this work was really just a way to explore, 00:08:13.030 --> 00:08:14.910 align:middle line:84% like I said, my femininity and masculinity 00:08:14.910 --> 00:08:17.530 align:middle line:84% and my theatricality and my queer identity itself 00:08:17.530 --> 00:08:23.290 align:middle line:84% and what I thought about it for myself and how I viewed myself 00:08:23.290 --> 00:08:28.590 align:middle line:84% and how I wanted the world to see a different part of me. 00:08:28.590 --> 00:08:34.049 align:middle line:84% This is also what led me to apply to art school. 00:08:34.049 --> 00:08:36.570 align:middle line:84% Art school, for me, was just something 00:08:36.570 --> 00:08:38.760 align:middle line:84% I knew I was going to do at some point. 00:08:38.760 --> 00:08:42.750 align:middle line:84% I wasn't really going for it before. 00:08:42.750 --> 00:08:44.880 align:middle line:84% But then when I got my status, that's 00:08:44.880 --> 00:08:47.190 align:middle line:84% when I realized I wanted to go art school. 00:08:47.190 --> 00:08:49.890 align:middle line:84% I really wanted to continue my education 00:08:49.890 --> 00:08:52.390 align:middle line:90% and try to push my photography. 00:08:52.390 --> 00:08:55.050 align:middle line:84% So I started applying for schools. 00:08:55.050 --> 00:08:58.050 align:middle line:84% Well, sorry-- I applied for one school. 00:08:58.050 --> 00:08:59.097 align:middle line:90% I didn't do any backups. 00:08:59.097 --> 00:09:00.180 align:middle line:90% I know that was bad of me. 00:09:00.180 --> 00:09:04.340 align:middle line:84% But I applied to SVA, and I got in. 00:09:04.340 --> 00:09:05.960 align:middle line:84% And this is the work that I showed 00:09:05.960 --> 00:09:07.940 align:middle line:84% and everything that got me into SVA. 00:09:07.940 --> 00:09:19.160 align:middle line:90% 00:09:19.160 --> 00:09:22.080 align:middle line:90% So my journey through SVA. 00:09:22.080 --> 00:09:26.580 align:middle line:84% Before SVA, my work was, like I said, self-portraits. 00:09:26.580 --> 00:09:32.130 align:middle line:84% But I was really just focusing on a fashion element and not 00:09:32.130 --> 00:09:32.760 align:middle line:90% really-- 00:09:32.760 --> 00:09:36.600 align:middle line:84% and kind of covering myself and hiding myself still 00:09:36.600 --> 00:09:39.420 align:middle line:84% within makeup and materials and clothing 00:09:39.420 --> 00:09:41.850 align:middle line:90% and fabrics and everything. 00:09:41.850 --> 00:09:44.000 align:middle line:84% And so when I got to SVA, I really 00:09:44.000 --> 00:09:45.390 align:middle line:90% want to try something different. 00:09:45.390 --> 00:09:47.780 align:middle line:84% And so I started photographing myself 00:09:47.780 --> 00:09:54.470 align:middle line:84% nude with different kind of colored lights and lights that 00:09:54.470 --> 00:09:59.330 align:middle line:84% had different kind of projections and everything 00:09:59.330 --> 00:10:00.860 align:middle line:90% to really give myself-- 00:10:00.860 --> 00:10:07.550 align:middle line:84% give my work more layers and a nightlife-- queer nightlife 00:10:07.550 --> 00:10:08.360 align:middle line:90% feel with it. 00:10:08.360 --> 00:10:12.090 align:middle line:90% 00:10:12.090 --> 00:10:14.760 align:middle line:84% So I would photograph myself around New York City, 00:10:14.760 --> 00:10:17.820 align:middle line:84% in my dorm room, or friends I had 00:10:17.820 --> 00:10:22.000 align:middle line:84% made in New York and their New York apartments. 00:10:22.000 --> 00:10:25.900 align:middle line:84% And it was just a way to explore myself and really 00:10:25.900 --> 00:10:28.690 align:middle line:84% explore my relationship with my body 00:10:28.690 --> 00:10:32.530 align:middle line:84% and how I felt with my body and how-- 00:10:32.530 --> 00:10:34.480 align:middle line:90% did I feel good in it? 00:10:34.480 --> 00:10:36.050 align:middle line:90% Did I not feel good? 00:10:36.050 --> 00:10:39.730 align:middle line:84% It was a really good way to start the conversation 00:10:39.730 --> 00:10:42.160 align:middle line:90% with myself, to really explore. 00:10:42.160 --> 00:10:43.600 align:middle line:90% Did I love my body? 00:10:43.600 --> 00:10:45.280 align:middle line:90% Did I love the skin I was in? 00:10:45.280 --> 00:10:49.530 align:middle line:90% 00:10:49.530 --> 00:10:53.580 align:middle line:84% And so it really helped me be more body positive 00:10:53.580 --> 00:10:56.910 align:middle line:84% but also really helped me embrace my body and the body 00:10:56.910 --> 00:10:58.890 align:middle line:90% that I was given-- 00:10:58.890 --> 00:11:02.670 align:middle line:84% and still be able to play with those themes of masculinity 00:11:02.670 --> 00:11:06.560 align:middle line:84% and femininity and theatricality. 00:11:06.560 --> 00:11:10.520 align:middle line:84% And this idea of dance being put into my work 00:11:10.520 --> 00:11:14.270 align:middle line:84% and posing in different ways to really push 00:11:14.270 --> 00:11:21.090 align:middle line:84% my body to see what my body could do within the poses. 00:11:21.090 --> 00:11:24.310 align:middle line:84% I didn't see-- in the beginning of my SVA work, I did-- 00:11:24.310 --> 00:11:25.660 align:middle line:90% I never showed my face. 00:11:25.660 --> 00:11:27.660 align:middle line:84% And then, my senior year, actually, 00:11:27.660 --> 00:11:29.130 align:middle line:84% is when I started showing my face 00:11:29.130 --> 00:11:33.660 align:middle line:90% and full frontal of my body. 00:11:33.660 --> 00:11:35.910 align:middle line:84% And I really wanted to start connecting with the queer 00:11:35.910 --> 00:11:40.140 align:middle line:84% men in my life that I had made friends with in SVA 00:11:40.140 --> 00:11:42.030 align:middle line:90% or in New York City. 00:11:42.030 --> 00:11:45.780 align:middle line:84% And it was kind of a nice pass of knowledge of-- like, 00:11:45.780 --> 00:11:47.280 align:middle line:84% sometimes they were younger than me, 00:11:47.280 --> 00:11:49.230 align:middle line:84% sometimes they were older than me. 00:11:49.230 --> 00:11:51.630 align:middle line:84% And, actually, some of them had dealt with HIV too. 00:11:51.630 --> 00:11:53.910 align:middle line:84% So it was a nice passing of knowledge 00:11:53.910 --> 00:11:56.750 align:middle line:84% from a younger to older person or-- 00:11:56.750 --> 00:11:58.930 align:middle line:90% and vice versa. 00:11:58.930 --> 00:12:02.340 align:middle line:84% And so it made the connection with me and this person 00:12:02.340 --> 00:12:04.980 align:middle line:84% in these photographs even stronger. 00:12:04.980 --> 00:12:07.590 align:middle line:84% And I felt even stronger connection with them 00:12:07.590 --> 00:12:08.790 align:middle line:90% after the photo was taken. 00:12:08.790 --> 00:12:14.010 align:middle line:90% 00:12:14.010 --> 00:12:17.700 align:middle line:90% And so I didn't also-- 00:12:17.700 --> 00:12:20.130 align:middle line:90% I didn't stick to one age range. 00:12:20.130 --> 00:12:23.250 align:middle line:84% I definitely would go for older men as well to photograph 00:12:23.250 --> 00:12:25.710 align:middle line:84% with, to befriend, just because their knowledge 00:12:25.710 --> 00:12:29.250 align:middle line:84% of what I was going through was also really prominent. 00:12:29.250 --> 00:12:31.500 align:middle line:84% Because they had gone through the-- 00:12:31.500 --> 00:12:36.270 align:middle line:84% lived through the HIV epidemic when they were young. 00:12:36.270 --> 00:12:38.490 align:middle line:84% And so the getting that kind of knowledge from them 00:12:38.490 --> 00:12:42.120 align:middle line:84% and to gain that experience helped form my identity 00:12:42.120 --> 00:12:44.550 align:middle line:84% and what I wanted to do with my work as well. 00:12:44.550 --> 00:12:48.600 align:middle line:84% Because I think with my work, I wanted to explore my identity 00:12:48.600 --> 00:12:52.140 align:middle line:84% but also explore my HIV status and what that means to me 00:12:52.140 --> 00:12:56.070 align:middle line:84% and what that means to the people around me. 00:12:56.070 --> 00:12:58.050 align:middle line:84% Because with my work, I want to be 00:12:58.050 --> 00:13:02.400 align:middle line:84% able to start a conversation about HIV 00:13:02.400 --> 00:13:07.970 align:middle line:84% and how-- even though we have come so far in treatments 00:13:07.970 --> 00:13:15.200 align:middle line:84% and in surviving this disease and this illness, 00:13:15.200 --> 00:13:18.090 align:middle line:84% I want to build a conversation still around it though. 00:13:18.090 --> 00:13:20.990 align:middle line:84% Because even though we have prep and even though we've 00:13:20.990 --> 00:13:23.840 align:middle line:84% moved really far ahead of our time since then, 00:13:23.840 --> 00:13:29.533 align:middle line:84% we still have such a stigma within the gay community, 00:13:29.533 --> 00:13:30.950 align:middle line:84% but also just within the community 00:13:30.950 --> 00:13:35.090 align:middle line:84% as a general, where there is a stigma and a fear of someone 00:13:35.090 --> 00:13:38.590 align:middle line:90% who has HIV. 00:13:38.590 --> 00:13:40.120 align:middle line:84% And so with my work going forward, 00:13:40.120 --> 00:13:42.430 align:middle line:84% I was trying to create a conversation 00:13:42.430 --> 00:13:45.040 align:middle line:90% to be up front with it as well. 00:13:45.040 --> 00:13:55.260 align:middle line:90% 00:13:55.260 --> 00:14:00.800 align:middle line:84% So after I graduated SVA, it was a big change for me, 00:14:00.800 --> 00:14:03.860 align:middle line:84% just because I was so used to being in school. 00:14:03.860 --> 00:14:06.260 align:middle line:84% I was in school for how many years of my life, 00:14:06.260 --> 00:14:10.320 align:middle line:84% and I was always on a strict schedule. 00:14:10.320 --> 00:14:13.580 align:middle line:84% And so after SVA, I graduated, and then I 00:14:13.580 --> 00:14:15.500 align:middle line:84% decided to take a break from photography just 00:14:15.500 --> 00:14:20.900 align:middle line:84% to relax after doing months of nonstop shooting and work. 00:14:20.900 --> 00:14:23.330 align:middle line:84% I decided to take a break, and then when I dived back 00:14:23.330 --> 00:14:26.640 align:middle line:90% into my work, I hit a wall. 00:14:26.640 --> 00:14:29.240 align:middle line:84% I tried going back to what I was doing at SVA, 00:14:29.240 --> 00:14:33.720 align:middle line:84% and I couldn't figure out what I was doing. 00:14:33.720 --> 00:14:36.815 align:middle line:84% And so I started printing out my work. 00:14:36.815 --> 00:14:39.590 align:middle line:90% 00:14:39.590 --> 00:14:42.200 align:middle line:84% Old-- just on regular printer paper, 00:14:42.200 --> 00:14:44.690 align:middle line:84% and I start printing out all my old photographs 00:14:44.690 --> 00:14:48.440 align:middle line:84% and tearing them apart and putting them back together. 00:14:48.440 --> 00:14:53.780 align:middle line:84% And just taking past me, present me, 00:14:53.780 --> 00:14:57.230 align:middle line:84% and putting together to build a new image of me, 00:14:57.230 --> 00:15:00.890 align:middle line:90% and possibly a future me. 00:15:00.890 --> 00:15:05.630 align:middle line:84% It was a way for me to re-explore my past work 00:15:05.630 --> 00:15:09.890 align:middle line:84% and what that work looks like to me now as a different person 00:15:09.890 --> 00:15:13.970 align:middle line:84% and if I still have the same ideals, the same morals, 00:15:13.970 --> 00:15:17.570 align:middle line:84% the same thoughts about it when I took that photo at that time 00:15:17.570 --> 00:15:20.150 align:middle line:84% and how much I've changed and grown since then. 00:15:20.150 --> 00:15:26.160 align:middle line:90% 00:15:26.160 --> 00:15:28.040 align:middle line:84% I was still exploring my body at the time 00:15:28.040 --> 00:15:31.610 align:middle line:84% as well, just as this person that 00:15:31.610 --> 00:15:34.280 align:middle line:84% now had this whole big future for them 00:15:34.280 --> 00:15:36.710 align:middle line:84% and figuring out what I wanted to do with my life 00:15:36.710 --> 00:15:38.660 align:middle line:90% after I graduated. 00:15:38.660 --> 00:15:40.970 align:middle line:84% I was just doing what I always do during times 00:15:40.970 --> 00:15:46.250 align:middle line:84% where I felt kind of lost, where I just start shooting stuff. 00:15:46.250 --> 00:15:49.160 align:middle line:84% That was a way for me to keep going-- is to just, 00:15:49.160 --> 00:15:52.610 align:middle line:84% no matter what kind of idea I had, I was always just, 00:15:52.610 --> 00:15:53.620 align:middle line:90% get the idea, shoot it. 00:15:53.620 --> 00:15:54.620 align:middle line:90% If I like it, I like it. 00:15:54.620 --> 00:15:56.390 align:middle line:84% If I don't like it, then it's fine. 00:15:56.390 --> 00:15:57.830 align:middle line:90% But it's a way to just-- 00:15:57.830 --> 00:16:01.160 align:middle line:84% a cathartic experience to try to move forward and try 00:16:01.160 --> 00:16:03.110 align:middle line:90% to see what I could do more of. 00:16:03.110 --> 00:16:09.430 align:middle line:90% 00:16:09.430 --> 00:16:13.540 align:middle line:84% A lot of my work going forward, I did a lot with fake flowers, 00:16:13.540 --> 00:16:16.810 align:middle line:84% as you saw on the previous images of the collage 00:16:16.810 --> 00:16:18.940 align:middle line:90% and the one before this. 00:16:18.940 --> 00:16:22.180 align:middle line:84% I was just using flowers as a way to just-- 00:16:22.180 --> 00:16:27.090 align:middle line:84% something that was, in a sense-- it is a lot-- 00:16:27.090 --> 00:16:29.760 align:middle line:84% flowers are alive, but I was using fake flowers 00:16:29.760 --> 00:16:33.060 align:middle line:84% because I love this idea of it never dying and always 00:16:33.060 --> 00:16:34.890 align:middle line:90% being beautiful. 00:16:34.890 --> 00:16:37.140 align:middle line:84% And I wanted to surround myself with that 00:16:37.140 --> 00:16:40.245 align:middle line:84% and surround my collages with it as well. 00:16:40.245 --> 00:16:50.410 align:middle line:90% 00:16:50.410 --> 00:16:53.110 align:middle line:84% I wanted to also get back into photographing people. 00:16:53.110 --> 00:16:55.720 align:middle line:84% After photographing myself all the time, 00:16:55.720 --> 00:16:57.460 align:middle line:84% I sometimes needed a break, and I wanted 00:16:57.460 --> 00:16:58.760 align:middle line:90% to photograph other people. 00:16:58.760 --> 00:17:01.990 align:middle line:84% And it's obviously a different experience photographing 00:17:01.990 --> 00:17:04.849 align:middle line:84% yourself when you're-- and photographing another person. 00:17:04.849 --> 00:17:07.480 align:middle line:84% So it was a nice way for me to explore 00:17:07.480 --> 00:17:10.569 align:middle line:84% relationships with other men-- with men again in my life. 00:17:10.569 --> 00:17:14.560 align:middle line:84% But then have it just be of them at times as well, 00:17:14.560 --> 00:17:17.514 align:middle line:84% and not just me and him or me and this person. 00:17:17.514 --> 00:17:33.260 align:middle line:90% 00:17:33.260 --> 00:17:36.060 align:middle line:90% So after shooting for-- 00:17:36.060 --> 00:17:40.170 align:middle line:84% all the time and just doing what I was doing, the pandemic hit. 00:17:40.170 --> 00:17:44.550 align:middle line:84% And I think, like everyone, when the pandemic hit, 00:17:44.550 --> 00:17:51.000 align:middle line:84% we felt this urge to be present and create work and be 00:17:51.000 --> 00:17:51.870 align:middle line:90% productive. 00:17:51.870 --> 00:17:56.520 align:middle line:84% And so for a good chunk of time, I was very productive. 00:17:56.520 --> 00:17:59.940 align:middle line:84% During the pandemic, I was photographing myself 00:17:59.940 --> 00:18:02.700 align:middle line:84% all the time just to keep myself busy 00:18:02.700 --> 00:18:05.790 align:middle line:84% and to remind myself that I was still there, that I was still 00:18:05.790 --> 00:18:07.500 align:middle line:90% capable of doing stuff. 00:18:07.500 --> 00:18:12.250 align:middle line:84% That, yes, COVID-19 was this worldwide pandemic, 00:18:12.250 --> 00:18:14.040 align:middle line:84% but I was like, I can still do stuff. 00:18:14.040 --> 00:18:16.320 align:middle line:84% I can still create work and create art. 00:18:16.320 --> 00:18:19.370 align:middle line:84% And it was a way to keep me going. 00:18:19.370 --> 00:18:21.560 align:middle line:84% But then, definitely, there was a time 00:18:21.560 --> 00:18:28.430 align:middle line:84% where, at a certain point, I just hit a wall again. 00:18:28.430 --> 00:18:30.620 align:middle line:84% And the pandemic really got to me, 00:18:30.620 --> 00:18:34.220 align:middle line:84% and my world just was not the same. 00:18:34.220 --> 00:18:35.870 align:middle line:84% The world wasn't the same anymore. 00:18:35.870 --> 00:18:38.450 align:middle line:90% And I wasn't the same. 00:18:38.450 --> 00:18:40.410 align:middle line:90% And I just felt lost. 00:18:40.410 --> 00:18:43.280 align:middle line:84% And so I just stopped shooting altogether, 00:18:43.280 --> 00:18:47.680 align:middle line:84% for months during the beginning of the pandemic. 00:18:47.680 --> 00:18:53.600 align:middle line:90% And then, after the break-- 00:18:53.600 --> 00:18:57.440 align:middle line:84% or after my huge break, I started working out. 00:18:57.440 --> 00:19:00.663 align:middle line:84% I started working out from home because the gyms were still 00:19:00.663 --> 00:19:01.580 align:middle line:90% closed and everything. 00:19:01.580 --> 00:19:04.190 align:middle line:84% And I used to work out all the time before the pandemic. 00:19:04.190 --> 00:19:07.550 align:middle line:84% And it was a way to just-- like another way to de-stress 00:19:07.550 --> 00:19:10.880 align:middle line:84% and relax and get some aggression out. 00:19:10.880 --> 00:19:12.770 align:middle line:84% But then when I was working out, I 00:19:12.770 --> 00:19:17.420 align:middle line:84% decided to do a photo every day of a workout 00:19:17.420 --> 00:19:20.780 align:middle line:90% to keep me accountable. 00:19:20.780 --> 00:19:25.783 align:middle line:84% But also just to have fun and start taking photos again, 00:19:25.783 --> 00:19:27.950 align:middle line:84% and give me a different subject and a different kind 00:19:27.950 --> 00:19:32.210 align:middle line:84% of style of photography where I wasn't really using 00:19:32.210 --> 00:19:33.260 align:middle line:90% different colored lights. 00:19:33.260 --> 00:19:36.860 align:middle line:84% I was using gels; I wasn't really using studio lights 00:19:36.860 --> 00:19:38.640 align:middle line:90% as much. 00:19:38.640 --> 00:19:42.230 align:middle line:84% And I was just photographing myself in my garage every day 00:19:42.230 --> 00:19:47.810 align:middle line:84% with these workout stuff and these weights 00:19:47.810 --> 00:19:53.250 align:middle line:84% and these benches, and just trying out different things. 00:19:53.250 --> 00:19:56.040 align:middle line:84% But also just working out and just having fun 00:19:56.040 --> 00:19:57.390 align:middle line:90% again with photography. 00:19:57.390 --> 00:20:01.560 align:middle line:90% 00:20:01.560 --> 00:20:05.310 align:middle line:84% And it kind of opened up my eyes to photography again and really 00:20:05.310 --> 00:20:07.470 align:middle line:84% gave me more of a drive and a passion for it 00:20:07.470 --> 00:20:10.380 align:middle line:84% again-- after not shooting for months 00:20:10.380 --> 00:20:13.410 align:middle line:84% and just being brought down by the pandemic 00:20:13.410 --> 00:20:21.300 align:middle line:84% and not feeling like it's just really positive anymore. 00:20:21.300 --> 00:20:24.190 align:middle line:84% So doing the workouts every day, and-- 00:20:24.190 --> 00:20:26.530 align:middle line:84% like, here, I swam, and then I decided 00:20:26.530 --> 00:20:29.440 align:middle line:84% to take some photos after with the lighting. 00:20:29.440 --> 00:20:34.980 align:middle line:84% So it really was just a way to keep me sharp, but also 00:20:34.980 --> 00:20:37.180 align:middle line:84% just keep me aware that I'm still alive 00:20:37.180 --> 00:20:39.780 align:middle line:84% and that I'm still capable of doing things, 00:20:39.780 --> 00:20:42.150 align:middle line:84% even during such a scary time of our lives. 00:20:42.150 --> 00:21:04.050 align:middle line:90% 00:21:04.050 --> 00:21:08.950 align:middle line:84% The workouts also was a way to keep me healthy, obviously, 00:21:08.950 --> 00:21:11.040 align:middle line:90% like mentally and physically. 00:21:11.040 --> 00:21:15.240 align:middle line:84% Because I think with the pandemic, it really-- 00:21:15.240 --> 00:21:19.630 align:middle line:84% there was a time where I had a scare with COVID-19. 00:21:19.630 --> 00:21:24.960 align:middle line:84% And I realized that I wasn't, obviously, again, 00:21:24.960 --> 00:21:28.230 align:middle line:84% invincible-- and so COVID-19 could hurt me too. 00:21:28.230 --> 00:21:29.920 align:middle line:84% And so I had a scare at one point, 00:21:29.920 --> 00:21:31.290 align:middle line:90% and it really shook me again. 00:21:31.290 --> 00:21:33.450 align:middle line:90% And it gave me-- 00:21:33.450 --> 00:21:40.550 align:middle line:84% I had memories of when I found out I was HIV positive. 00:21:40.550 --> 00:21:43.160 align:middle line:84% And it kind of reconnected it back to me again. 00:21:43.160 --> 00:21:49.400 align:middle line:84% How I felt so invincible before HIV, and then I got it. 00:21:49.400 --> 00:21:53.343 align:middle line:84% And then, I was scared about COVID to a certain extent. 00:21:53.343 --> 00:21:55.010 align:middle line:84% And then when I thought I almost got it, 00:21:55.010 --> 00:21:57.340 align:middle line:84% it really changed my world again. 00:21:57.340 --> 00:22:03.890 align:middle line:84% And so the workout photos also helped me dealt with my anxiety 00:22:03.890 --> 00:22:08.480 align:middle line:84% and pushing forward and figuring out if I was OK 00:22:08.480 --> 00:22:12.730 align:middle line:84% and keep myself centered and focused. 00:22:12.730 --> 00:22:36.310 align:middle line:90% 00:22:36.310 --> 00:22:40.620 align:middle line:84% So my future going forward with all the stuff 00:22:40.620 --> 00:22:43.620 align:middle line:84% that I've been doing, now shooting more often, still 00:22:43.620 --> 00:22:47.550 align:middle line:84% doing stuff that I did in SVA, like portraits of queer men, 00:22:47.550 --> 00:22:49.320 align:middle line:90% doing my collage work. 00:22:49.320 --> 00:22:51.990 align:middle line:84% I want to explore more and do more things 00:22:51.990 --> 00:22:55.620 align:middle line:84% and just see what else I was capable of. 00:22:55.620 --> 00:22:58.080 align:middle line:84% So some of the new work I'm working on right now 00:22:58.080 --> 00:23:03.360 align:middle line:84% is more of a focus on me being a queer Filipino American 00:23:03.360 --> 00:23:05.600 align:middle line:90% and what that means to me. 00:23:05.600 --> 00:23:09.800 align:middle line:84% And what do I really identify with? 00:23:09.800 --> 00:23:12.120 align:middle line:84% Like, I really am proud of being queer. 00:23:12.120 --> 00:23:13.860 align:middle line:84% I'm really proud of being Filipino. 00:23:13.860 --> 00:23:18.760 align:middle line:84% But am I really proud of being an American, I guess. 00:23:18.760 --> 00:23:24.240 align:middle line:84% And how all that intertwines and do-- 00:23:24.240 --> 00:23:25.980 align:middle line:84% is it wrong that I'm more prideful 00:23:25.980 --> 00:23:27.360 align:middle line:90% about one thing than the other? 00:23:27.360 --> 00:23:30.240 align:middle line:84% Or how do I balance all of it together? 00:23:30.240 --> 00:23:33.030 align:middle line:90% 00:23:33.030 --> 00:23:37.230 align:middle line:84% And what these flags mean to everyone. 00:23:37.230 --> 00:23:40.590 align:middle line:84% You-- when you see someone with a queer-- 00:23:40.590 --> 00:23:44.790 align:middle line:84% with a pride flag or with an American flag or just a flag 00:23:44.790 --> 00:23:47.310 align:middle line:84% of their heritage, you automatically 00:23:47.310 --> 00:23:53.120 align:middle line:84% get a sense of who they are as a person and an idea of what 00:23:53.120 --> 00:23:55.130 align:middle line:90% their ideals and morals are. 00:23:55.130 --> 00:23:59.620 align:middle line:84% And I have my own thoughts when I see someone with a pride flag 00:23:59.620 --> 00:24:03.160 align:middle line:84% or with the Filipino flag or with an American flag flying 00:24:03.160 --> 00:24:05.540 align:middle line:84% in front of their house or on their car. 00:24:05.540 --> 00:24:06.490 align:middle line:90% And so it's a nice-- 00:24:06.490 --> 00:24:11.560 align:middle line:84% it's me exploring that and my assumptions 00:24:11.560 --> 00:24:14.110 align:middle line:84% about people and my-- people's assumptions about me 00:24:14.110 --> 00:24:16.870 align:middle line:84% when they find out I'm a queer Filipino American. 00:24:16.870 --> 00:24:25.590 align:middle line:90% 00:24:25.590 --> 00:24:28.110 align:middle line:84% There's a work-- I cannot remember 00:24:28.110 --> 00:24:31.910 align:middle line:84% the photographer's name-- but after I did this, 00:24:31.910 --> 00:24:33.350 align:middle line:90% a friend of mine brought him up. 00:24:33.350 --> 00:24:40.220 align:middle line:84% It was the work of soldiers who tied up these prisoners, I 00:24:40.220 --> 00:24:41.150 align:middle line:90% think, or something. 00:24:41.150 --> 00:24:44.630 align:middle line:84% And he referenced this photo-- he referenced that photo 00:24:44.630 --> 00:24:45.590 align:middle line:90% to this photo. 00:24:45.590 --> 00:24:49.310 align:middle line:84% And this was just an idea of me wrapping myself 00:24:49.310 --> 00:24:56.900 align:middle line:84% up in these flags and, in a way, suffocating myself and trying 00:24:56.900 --> 00:25:05.540 align:middle line:84% to feel connected to these identities that I have 00:25:05.540 --> 00:25:07.790 align:middle line:90% and what I felt about them. 00:25:07.790 --> 00:25:15.480 align:middle line:90% 00:25:15.480 --> 00:25:17.220 align:middle line:90% We see flags everywhere. 00:25:17.220 --> 00:25:20.550 align:middle line:84% When you walk around, mostly you see American flags, obviously. 00:25:20.550 --> 00:25:25.390 align:middle line:84% You sometimes see other flags that are being waved around. 00:25:25.390 --> 00:25:27.780 align:middle line:84% Especially and obviously, during Pride Month, 00:25:27.780 --> 00:25:30.860 align:middle line:84% you see a lot of the pride flags. 00:25:30.860 --> 00:25:35.540 align:middle line:84% And so since then, I've been photographing every flag I see. 00:25:35.540 --> 00:25:37.835 align:middle line:84% Obviously, I see more pride and American-- 00:25:37.835 --> 00:25:39.470 align:middle line:90% American flags and pride flags. 00:25:39.470 --> 00:25:42.650 align:middle line:84% And I definitely don't see really Filipino flags as much. 00:25:42.650 --> 00:25:45.740 align:middle line:84% But that's what I'm looking for right now in my work 00:25:45.740 --> 00:25:48.290 align:middle line:84% is combining that with my self-portraits 00:25:48.290 --> 00:25:50.330 align:middle line:84% and my portraits of flags as well. 00:25:50.330 --> 00:25:57.480 align:middle line:90% 00:25:57.480 --> 00:26:00.450 align:middle line:84% This is a work that I'm also looking at. 00:26:00.450 --> 00:26:02.850 align:middle line:90% Focusing on the stigma-- 00:26:02.850 --> 00:26:05.190 align:middle line:84% again, like I did talk about earlier-- 00:26:05.190 --> 00:26:09.090 align:middle line:84% the stigma that I face being HIV positive. 00:26:09.090 --> 00:26:11.970 align:middle line:84% And also the verbiage that people 00:26:11.970 --> 00:26:15.248 align:middle line:84% use on apps like Grindr and SCRUFF 00:26:15.248 --> 00:26:17.040 align:middle line:84% and everything when they talk about someone 00:26:17.040 --> 00:26:18.450 align:middle line:90% who's HIV positive. 00:26:18.450 --> 00:26:21.810 align:middle line:84% And the question of are you clean? 00:26:21.810 --> 00:26:25.620 align:middle line:84% Or telling people, oh, I'm clean, in regards-- 00:26:25.620 --> 00:26:28.290 align:middle line:84% so they're just saying, oh, are you HIV positive? 00:26:28.290 --> 00:26:30.030 align:middle line:90% Or do you have STDs or-- 00:26:30.030 --> 00:26:32.220 align:middle line:90% no, I don't have HIV. 00:26:32.220 --> 00:26:34.630 align:middle line:84% I don't have STDs, so I'm a clean person. 00:26:34.630 --> 00:26:38.410 align:middle line:84% And so this is me exploring that in a different way. 00:26:38.410 --> 00:26:41.370 align:middle line:84% So I made myself its own little body wash. 00:26:41.370 --> 00:26:45.540 align:middle line:84% And it's like a way to, kind of, clean yourself of HIV 00:26:45.540 --> 00:26:48.690 align:middle line:84% or clean yourself of that-- with this idea 00:26:48.690 --> 00:26:52.510 align:middle line:84% that if you're HIV positive, you are not clean. 00:26:52.510 --> 00:26:53.320 align:middle line:90% You are dirty. 00:26:53.320 --> 00:26:55.890 align:middle line:90% 00:26:55.890 --> 00:26:58.230 align:middle line:84% And so with this project, I'm working on that. 00:26:58.230 --> 00:27:01.110 align:middle line:84% I'm also-- this idea of this words 00:27:01.110 --> 00:27:06.340 align:middle line:84% that people use on apps like this where it becomes racist. 00:27:06.340 --> 00:27:09.700 align:middle line:84% And when they say, no rice, no spice, 00:27:09.700 --> 00:27:13.300 align:middle line:84% and how problematic that can be and how hurtful 00:27:13.300 --> 00:27:15.660 align:middle line:90% that can be to people. 00:27:15.660 --> 00:27:19.430 align:middle line:84% And so I'm hoping to dive more into that work as well 00:27:19.430 --> 00:27:22.850 align:middle line:84% and explore the stigma that I face as HIV positive, 00:27:22.850 --> 00:27:29.090 align:middle line:84% but also the racism I face for being a brown person who 00:27:29.090 --> 00:27:29.870 align:middle line:90% is Filipino. 00:27:29.870 --> 00:27:35.630 align:middle line:90% 00:27:35.630 --> 00:27:37.890 align:middle line:84% And I don't know if this will play. 00:27:37.890 --> 00:27:39.807 align:middle line:84% And I don't know if you'll be able to hear it, 00:27:39.807 --> 00:27:42.215 align:middle line:84% but this is also just a video I did. 00:27:42.215 --> 00:27:43.040 align:middle line:90% [VIDEO PLAYBACK] 00:27:43.040 --> 00:27:45.440 align:middle line:90% [WIND BLOWING] 00:27:45.440 --> 00:27:51.200 align:middle line:90% 00:27:51.200 --> 00:27:52.970 align:middle line:90% - "Person and Persona" 00:27:52.970 --> 00:27:58.520 align:middle line:84% A person, multiple personas, some beaming and some not. 00:27:58.520 --> 00:28:02.960 align:middle line:84% So many personas, connecting and disconnecting from the person-- 00:28:02.960 --> 00:28:05.540 align:middle line:84% coming together and falling apart. 00:28:05.540 --> 00:28:07.250 align:middle line:90% Old personas dying out. 00:28:07.250 --> 00:28:09.710 align:middle line:90% New personas being created. 00:28:09.710 --> 00:28:12.050 align:middle line:84% Finding out more about the person. 00:28:12.050 --> 00:28:14.210 align:middle line:84% Discovering these personas and this person 00:28:14.210 --> 00:28:17.926 align:middle line:84% is who we are, ever-changing and ever-growing. 00:28:17.926 --> 00:28:33.710 align:middle line:90% 00:28:33.710 --> 00:28:35.480 align:middle line:90% "Wind" 00:28:35.480 --> 00:28:38.420 align:middle line:84% The wind blowing, moving through this world. 00:28:38.420 --> 00:28:41.900 align:middle line:84% A constant force, never stopping to rest. 00:28:41.900 --> 00:28:45.650 align:middle line:84% Faster and stronger, slower and softer. 00:28:45.650 --> 00:28:48.185 align:middle line:84% Becoming one thing, then disappearing into nothing. 00:28:48.185 --> 00:29:03.200 align:middle line:90% 00:29:03.200 --> 00:29:05.390 align:middle line:90% "Fag/Faggot" 00:29:05.390 --> 00:29:07.010 align:middle line:90% I am a fag-- 00:29:07.010 --> 00:29:09.380 align:middle line:90% a cigarette or a queer person. 00:29:09.380 --> 00:29:10.760 align:middle line:90% I am a faggot-- 00:29:10.760 --> 00:29:13.580 align:middle line:90% a bundle of sticks or a gay man. 00:29:13.580 --> 00:29:17.510 align:middle line:84% Words to describe who we are, what our identity is. 00:29:17.510 --> 00:29:20.690 align:middle line:84% The persona is multileveled and complicated. 00:29:20.690 --> 00:29:22.610 align:middle line:84% It is always developing and flourishing, 00:29:22.610 --> 00:29:25.790 align:middle line:84% while also becoming stagnant and static. 00:29:25.790 --> 00:29:27.050 align:middle line:90% Am I a fag? 00:29:27.050 --> 00:29:28.490 align:middle line:90% Am I a faggot? 00:29:28.490 --> 00:29:29.990 align:middle line:90% Am I a Filipino? 00:29:29.990 --> 00:29:31.850 align:middle line:90% Am I American? 00:29:31.850 --> 00:29:34.610 align:middle line:84% Am I all these things and also none? 00:29:34.610 --> 00:29:37.760 align:middle line:84% The wind, a force that's strong and gentle. 00:29:37.760 --> 00:29:40.490 align:middle line:84% A force that is always changing and moving. 00:29:40.490 --> 00:29:42.800 align:middle line:84% Becoming something new as times change, 00:29:42.800 --> 00:29:45.230 align:middle line:90% but always being the wind. 00:29:45.230 --> 00:29:48.740 align:middle line:84% Will I continue to thrive but also stay still? 00:29:48.740 --> 00:29:51.350 align:middle line:84% Becoming something new, but remembering who I used to be? 00:29:51.350 --> 00:29:54.680 align:middle line:90% 00:29:54.680 --> 00:29:55.940 align:middle line:90% I am a fag. 00:29:55.940 --> 00:29:57.380 align:middle line:90% I am a faggot. 00:29:57.380 --> 00:29:58.760 align:middle line:90% I am a Filipino. 00:29:58.760 --> 00:29:59.930 align:middle line:90% I am an American. 00:29:59.930 --> 00:30:14.030 align:middle line:90% 00:30:14.030 --> 00:30:15.830 align:middle line:90% "Person and Persona" 00:30:15.830 --> 00:30:21.350 align:middle line:84% A person, multiple personas, some beaming, and some not. 00:30:21.350 --> 00:30:25.790 align:middle line:84% So many personas, connecting and disconnecting from the person-- 00:30:25.790 --> 00:30:28.370 align:middle line:84% coming together and falling apart. 00:30:28.370 --> 00:30:30.110 align:middle line:90% Old personas dying out. 00:30:30.110 --> 00:30:32.510 align:middle line:90% New personas being created. 00:30:32.510 --> 00:30:34.880 align:middle line:84% Finding out more about the person. 00:30:34.880 --> 00:30:37.040 align:middle line:84% Discovering these personas and this person 00:30:37.040 --> 00:30:40.746 align:middle line:84% is who we are, ever-changing and ever-growing. 00:30:40.746 --> 00:30:53.450 align:middle line:90% 00:30:53.450 --> 00:30:55.190 align:middle line:90% "Wind" 00:30:55.190 --> 00:30:58.160 align:middle line:84% The wind blowing, moving through this world. 00:30:58.160 --> 00:31:01.610 align:middle line:84% A constant force, never stopping to rest. 00:31:01.610 --> 00:31:05.390 align:middle line:84% Faster and stronger, slower and softer. 00:31:05.390 --> 00:31:07.925 align:middle line:84% Becoming one thing, then disappearing into nothing. 00:31:07.925 --> 00:31:17.120 align:middle line:90% 00:31:17.120 --> 00:31:19.340 align:middle line:90% "Fag/Faggot" 00:31:19.340 --> 00:31:20.930 align:middle line:90% I am a fag-- 00:31:20.930 --> 00:31:23.340 align:middle line:90% a cigarette or a queer person. 00:31:23.340 --> 00:31:24.710 align:middle line:90% I am a faggot-- 00:31:24.710 --> 00:31:27.500 align:middle line:90% a bundle of sticks or gay man. 00:31:27.500 --> 00:31:31.490 align:middle line:84% Words to describe who we are, what our identity is. 00:31:31.490 --> 00:31:34.610 align:middle line:84% The persona is multileveled and complicated. 00:31:34.610 --> 00:31:36.560 align:middle line:84% It is always developing and flourishing, 00:31:36.560 --> 00:31:39.710 align:middle line:84% while also becoming stagnant and static. 00:31:39.710 --> 00:31:40.970 align:middle line:90% Am I a fag? 00:31:40.970 --> 00:31:42.440 align:middle line:90% Am I a faggot? 00:31:42.440 --> 00:31:43.940 align:middle line:90% Am I a Filipino? 00:31:43.940 --> 00:31:45.770 align:middle line:90% Am I American? 00:31:45.770 --> 00:31:48.530 align:middle line:84% Am I all these things and also none? 00:31:48.530 --> 00:31:51.710 align:middle line:84% The wind, a force that is strong and gentle. 00:31:51.710 --> 00:31:54.440 align:middle line:84% A force that is always changing and moving. 00:31:54.440 --> 00:31:56.780 align:middle line:84% Becoming something new as times change, 00:31:56.780 --> 00:31:59.120 align:middle line:90% but always being the wind. 00:31:59.120 --> 00:32:02.720 align:middle line:84% Will I continue to thrive, but also stay still? 00:32:02.720 --> 00:32:05.270 align:middle line:84% Becoming something new, but remembering who I used to be? 00:32:05.270 --> 00:32:08.600 align:middle line:90% 00:32:08.600 --> 00:32:09.860 align:middle line:90% I am a fag. 00:32:09.860 --> 00:32:11.300 align:middle line:90% I am a faggot. 00:32:11.300 --> 00:32:12.740 align:middle line:90% I am a Filipino. 00:32:12.740 --> 00:32:13.850 align:middle line:90% I am an American. 00:32:13.850 --> 00:32:20.867 align:middle line:90% 00:32:20.867 --> 00:32:21.450 align:middle line:90% [END PLAYBACK] 00:32:21.450 --> 00:32:24.380 align:middle line:84% So, yeah, that's just more of a exploration of me. 00:32:24.380 --> 00:32:29.840 align:middle line:84% And also, if you could hear the last, I guess, poem 00:32:29.840 --> 00:32:33.170 align:middle line:84% or whatever it was, "Fag/Faggot," and so that's 00:32:33.170 --> 00:32:37.780 align:middle line:84% also just me exploring those words that 00:32:37.780 --> 00:32:44.253 align:middle line:84% are problematic and can be very hard to hear for some people. 00:32:44.253 --> 00:32:45.670 align:middle line:84% And for me, definitely, was really 00:32:45.670 --> 00:32:48.070 align:middle line:84% hard to hear for many years in my life 00:32:48.070 --> 00:32:51.550 align:middle line:84% as a queer person, hearing that being said to me. 00:32:51.550 --> 00:32:55.060 align:middle line:84% But to me now, just, once again, reclaiming those words. 00:32:55.060 --> 00:32:59.900 align:middle line:84% And using those words again as a way to fuel my work 00:32:59.900 --> 00:33:03.470 align:middle line:84% and fuel myself and my photography, my artistry, 00:33:03.470 --> 00:33:07.010 align:middle line:84% and moving forward and seeing what that will-- 00:33:07.010 --> 00:33:08.390 align:middle line:90% where that will take me. 00:33:08.390 --> 00:33:13.580 align:middle line:84% And I think it's also one of those words that can really 00:33:13.580 --> 00:33:14.450 align:middle line:90% shock people. 00:33:14.450 --> 00:33:16.850 align:middle line:84% And I think that's a really good way 00:33:16.850 --> 00:33:23.320 align:middle line:84% to start that discussion about my work and about those words 00:33:23.320 --> 00:33:26.170 align:middle line:84% and about how we see people, queer people. 00:33:26.170 --> 00:33:29.820 align:middle line:90% 00:33:29.820 --> 00:33:33.320 align:middle line:84% Can I ask, the video piece that you shared at the end-- 00:33:33.320 --> 00:33:33.980 align:middle line:90% Yes. 00:33:33.980 --> 00:33:37.190 align:middle line:84% --so that's your original writing? 00:33:37.190 --> 00:33:38.070 align:middle line:90% Yes. 00:33:38.070 --> 00:33:38.570 align:middle line:90% OK. 00:33:38.570 --> 00:33:40.910 align:middle line:84% Is that something that you often do? 00:33:40.910 --> 00:33:43.850 align:middle line:84% Do you write in relationship to the work that you create 00:33:43.850 --> 00:33:44.810 align:middle line:90% or [INAUDIBLE]? 00:33:44.810 --> 00:33:45.350 align:middle line:90% No. 00:33:45.350 --> 00:33:47.720 align:middle line:84% This is all something very new to me, the writing. 00:33:47.720 --> 00:33:50.000 align:middle line:84% I mean, besides my writing is always [INAUDIBLE].. 00:33:50.000 --> 00:33:51.620 align:middle line:84% As far as I do for my writing, it's 00:33:51.620 --> 00:33:54.740 align:middle line:84% always ever just been an artist statement here and there, 00:33:54.740 --> 00:33:56.630 align:middle line:84% or an elevator statement, something 00:33:56.630 --> 00:34:00.380 align:middle line:84% just very general and really strictly about the art. 00:34:00.380 --> 00:34:03.770 align:middle line:84% This is my first time, really, doing writing in regards 00:34:03.770 --> 00:34:06.810 align:middle line:90% to my work as a piece of it. 00:34:06.810 --> 00:34:10.590 align:middle line:84% That it's not just about it, but actually is part of the work 00:34:10.590 --> 00:34:12.176 align:middle line:90% itself-- 00:34:12.176 --> 00:34:12.676 align:middle line:90% All right. 00:34:12.676 --> 00:34:13.176 align:middle line:90% Thanks. 00:34:13.176 --> 00:34:15.800 align:middle line:84% And so that's something I'm exploring and figuring out 00:34:15.800 --> 00:34:21.190 align:middle line:84% and seeing if I'm good at this or not. 00:34:21.190 --> 00:34:21.690 align:middle line:90% All right. 00:34:21.690 --> 00:34:23.889 align:middle line:90% Thank you for sharing that. 00:34:23.889 --> 00:34:26.880 align:middle line:84% So I want to remind everybody, you can raise your hand 00:34:26.880 --> 00:34:29.760 align:middle line:84% and unmute and ask Eric a question if you would like. 00:34:29.760 --> 00:34:32.230 align:middle line:84% Equally, you could also use the chat function. 00:34:32.230 --> 00:34:33.989 align:middle line:84% So feel free to type your questions there, 00:34:33.989 --> 00:34:38.020 align:middle line:84% and Andy and I will ask those questions for you. 00:34:38.020 --> 00:34:39.780 align:middle line:84% So if that's your preference-- oh, 00:34:39.780 --> 00:34:42.690 align:middle line:90% here I've got one from Dr. Romo. 00:34:42.690 --> 00:34:44.280 align:middle line:84% Which piece or work have you found 00:34:44.280 --> 00:34:47.100 align:middle line:84% to be most impactful to your followers? 00:34:47.100 --> 00:34:52.620 align:middle line:90% 00:34:52.620 --> 00:34:54.510 align:middle line:84% I think my work that I think has been 00:34:54.510 --> 00:34:59.460 align:middle line:84% most impactful to my followers has been my self-portraits 00:34:59.460 --> 00:35:01.260 align:middle line:90% with queer people. 00:35:01.260 --> 00:35:04.420 align:middle line:84% I think them seeing a connection-- 00:35:04.420 --> 00:35:07.110 align:middle line:84% me having a connection, a relationship, 00:35:07.110 --> 00:35:09.960 align:middle line:84% with these men in my life and it not 00:35:09.960 --> 00:35:11.940 align:middle line:90% being automatically sexual-- 00:35:11.940 --> 00:35:14.910 align:middle line:90% because I think as queer men-- 00:35:14.910 --> 00:35:19.140 align:middle line:84% as a queer person, I think a lot of people see that and-- 00:35:19.140 --> 00:35:23.490 align:middle line:84% sexuality and sex is a big part of our community and the way 00:35:23.490 --> 00:35:26.340 align:middle line:84% we live our lives, but I wanted to also show 00:35:26.340 --> 00:35:29.778 align:middle line:90% that we're more than that. 00:35:29.778 --> 00:35:32.070 align:middle line:84% There's nothing-- I have nothing against it, obviously, 00:35:32.070 --> 00:35:33.240 align:middle line:90% but my work-- 00:35:33.240 --> 00:35:35.420 align:middle line:84% I think, I wanted to show there's 00:35:35.420 --> 00:35:41.670 align:middle line:84% a love and a bond between queer men together. 00:35:41.670 --> 00:35:43.560 align:middle line:84% And when I photograph with them, it 00:35:43.560 --> 00:35:45.780 align:middle line:84% just-- you see that strong connection with us. 00:35:45.780 --> 00:35:47.280 align:middle line:84% And I think that has been the most 00:35:47.280 --> 00:35:48.600 align:middle line:90% impactful for my followers. 00:35:48.600 --> 00:35:51.210 align:middle line:84% If anything, it's been one of the most impactful for myself. 00:35:51.210 --> 00:35:56.860 align:middle line:90% 00:35:56.860 --> 00:35:59.770 align:middle line:84% But actually for piece, I think two of the pieces 00:35:59.770 --> 00:36:02.650 align:middle line:84% that I showed in the actual slide show, me with my friend 00:36:02.650 --> 00:36:08.560 align:middle line:84% Isaiah on the stairs and also the picture of me 00:36:08.560 --> 00:36:11.920 align:middle line:84% with the two men on my side in the red light, 00:36:11.920 --> 00:36:15.850 align:middle line:84% I think have also been the most impactful for work-wise 00:36:15.850 --> 00:36:16.720 align:middle line:90% from that series. 00:36:16.720 --> 00:36:19.142 align:middle line:90% 00:36:19.142 --> 00:36:19.850 align:middle line:90% I love that Eric. 00:36:19.850 --> 00:36:23.720 align:middle line:84% I love the way that series really 00:36:23.720 --> 00:36:27.260 align:middle line:84% highlights the solidarity, in addition to love. 00:36:27.260 --> 00:36:30.572 align:middle line:84% I mean, they're really beautiful-- 00:36:30.572 --> 00:36:32.030 align:middle line:84% yeah, they're really-- they're just 00:36:32.030 --> 00:36:33.750 align:middle line:90% really beautiful portraits. 00:36:33.750 --> 00:36:34.250 align:middle line:90% Wonderful. 00:36:34.250 --> 00:36:35.240 align:middle line:90% Thank you. 00:36:35.240 --> 00:36:39.830 align:middle line:84% So I appreciate you sharing today the ebbs and flows 00:36:39.830 --> 00:36:41.060 align:middle line:90% of your creative process. 00:36:41.060 --> 00:36:44.480 align:middle line:84% I think that's really important and something that artists 00:36:44.480 --> 00:36:46.010 align:middle line:90% and art students and-- 00:36:46.010 --> 00:36:47.150 align:middle line:90% we don't often talk about. 00:36:47.150 --> 00:36:54.030 align:middle line:84% It's not this constant 100-mile-an-hour kind of thing, 00:36:54.030 --> 00:36:54.530 align:middle line:90% right? 00:36:54.530 --> 00:36:58.060 align:middle line:84% Like, life gets in the way sometimes. 00:36:58.060 --> 00:37:00.440 align:middle line:84% Your mental health or your physical health 00:37:00.440 --> 00:37:10.130 align:middle line:84% might impact how creatively work flows and those great moments 00:37:10.130 --> 00:37:14.670 align:middle line:84% and the challenges that anybody has, regardless of what you do. 00:37:14.670 --> 00:37:16.950 align:middle line:90% So I really appreciate that. 00:37:16.950 --> 00:37:23.330 align:middle line:84% Can you talk a little more about just the creative process 00:37:23.330 --> 00:37:27.200 align:middle line:90% for you and how it flows? 00:37:27.200 --> 00:37:28.580 align:middle line:90% Yeah, definitely. 00:37:28.580 --> 00:37:32.250 align:middle line:90% So a lot of my work-- 00:37:32.250 --> 00:37:36.900 align:middle line:84% like, during my time, like during SVA, my inspiration-- 00:37:36.900 --> 00:37:43.380 align:middle line:84% I would just look at old photo books and books in my library 00:37:43.380 --> 00:37:48.470 align:middle line:90% with statues and paintings. 00:37:48.470 --> 00:37:51.260 align:middle line:84% I was just really looking for poses to help really inspire me 00:37:51.260 --> 00:37:54.380 align:middle line:84% because there was onl-- there's in my repertoire poses, 00:37:54.380 --> 00:37:55.890 align:middle line:90% I can only do so much. 00:37:55.890 --> 00:37:58.820 align:middle line:84% And so it was a nice way to explore that more and that 00:37:58.820 --> 00:38:00.260 align:middle line:90% helped really inspire me. 00:38:00.260 --> 00:38:02.720 align:middle line:84% For other work, it's kind of just me looking back 00:38:02.720 --> 00:38:05.910 align:middle line:84% on my past work and seeing what I've done. 00:38:05.910 --> 00:38:08.660 align:middle line:84% And when I look back on my past work now, 00:38:08.660 --> 00:38:10.520 align:middle line:84% I sometimes see different connection 00:38:10.520 --> 00:38:13.970 align:middle line:84% or see a thread that goes through multiple pieces of work 00:38:13.970 --> 00:38:15.840 align:middle line:90% that I never saw before. 00:38:15.840 --> 00:38:19.250 align:middle line:84% And then I take that and start connecting it all again, 00:38:19.250 --> 00:38:21.780 align:middle line:84% and then reshooting it something differently. 00:38:21.780 --> 00:38:23.540 align:middle line:84% So it all kind of threads together 00:38:23.540 --> 00:38:24.665 align:middle line:90% and connects at one time. 00:38:24.665 --> 00:38:27.370 align:middle line:90% 00:38:27.370 --> 00:38:30.060 align:middle line:84% So that's how, lately, my inspiration 00:38:30.060 --> 00:38:31.560 align:middle line:90% has been coming from. 00:38:31.560 --> 00:38:36.390 align:middle line:84% And also I've been taking a lot of walks 00:38:36.390 --> 00:38:40.410 align:middle line:84% and seeing things that I think are beautiful or inspire 00:38:40.410 --> 00:38:42.360 align:middle line:90% me to-- 00:38:42.360 --> 00:38:43.800 align:middle line:90% and I'll just take that photo. 00:38:43.800 --> 00:38:46.680 align:middle line:84% Like the photo in my slideshow of just the pride 00:38:46.680 --> 00:38:48.480 align:middle line:90% flag in front of that building. 00:38:48.480 --> 00:38:50.640 align:middle line:84% That's actually the photo that kind of started me 00:38:50.640 --> 00:38:55.890 align:middle line:84% on this whole process of my flag series 00:38:55.890 --> 00:38:59.820 align:middle line:84% and going forward and seeing what that meant to me. 00:38:59.820 --> 00:39:03.540 align:middle line:84% And it really all just started with a photo of a flag. 00:39:03.540 --> 00:39:08.480 align:middle line:84% And that really inspired me to delve deeper in my-- 00:39:08.480 --> 00:39:13.020 align:middle line:84% the relationship with myself as a queer Filipino American. 00:39:13.020 --> 00:39:13.520 align:middle line:90% Thanks. 00:39:13.520 --> 00:39:15.020 align:middle line:90% I also think it's interesting-- 00:39:15.020 --> 00:39:19.028 align:middle line:84% I love how you said that your prediagnosis work-- 00:39:19.028 --> 00:39:20.570 align:middle line:84% you were passionate about photography 00:39:20.570 --> 00:39:22.100 align:middle line:90% but not fully invested. 00:39:22.100 --> 00:39:25.190 align:middle line:84% And so then getting that diagnosis, which 00:39:25.190 --> 00:39:28.610 align:middle line:84% some people would consider a challenging moment in one's 00:39:28.610 --> 00:39:35.540 align:middle line:84% life, that really ignited this focus and ambition 00:39:35.540 --> 00:39:36.445 align:middle line:90% in your work. 00:39:36.445 --> 00:39:37.820 align:middle line:84% And so-- and you-- similarly, you 00:39:37.820 --> 00:39:41.090 align:middle line:84% talked about that ebb and flow during COVID 00:39:41.090 --> 00:39:45.620 align:middle line:84% and how the scare, again, lit this fire. 00:39:45.620 --> 00:39:48.530 align:middle line:84% And so I think it's interesting to talk about challenging times 00:39:48.530 --> 00:39:50.990 align:middle line:90% actually being a fuel. 00:39:50.990 --> 00:39:52.220 align:middle line:90% It's not just happy times. 00:39:52.220 --> 00:39:55.060 align:middle line:90% It's not just joy, necessarily. 00:39:55.060 --> 00:39:56.260 align:middle line:90% Yeah. 00:39:56.260 --> 00:39:58.390 align:middle line:90% One of the things that really-- 00:39:58.390 --> 00:40:02.560 align:middle line:84% there's a show I used to watch Queer 00:40:02.560 --> 00:40:05.890 align:middle line:84% As Folk, the American one, and one of the characters in Queer 00:40:05.890 --> 00:40:08.620 align:middle line:90% As Folk is gay bashed. 00:40:08.620 --> 00:40:12.850 align:middle line:84% And after it happens, a friend visits him, 00:40:12.850 --> 00:40:15.160 align:middle line:84% and he's just in his room and there's 00:40:15.160 --> 00:40:17.800 align:middle line:84% drawings and paintings everywhere or something. 00:40:17.800 --> 00:40:20.740 align:middle line:84% And he explains that he's creating-- 00:40:20.740 --> 00:40:23.650 align:middle line:84% he's drawing to remind himself and to show people and show 00:40:23.650 --> 00:40:26.620 align:middle line:84% himself that what happened didn't-- 00:40:26.620 --> 00:40:27.580 align:middle line:90% they didn't get him. 00:40:27.580 --> 00:40:28.970 align:middle line:90% Like, he's still there. 00:40:28.970 --> 00:40:32.180 align:middle line:84% And so that stuck with me after I saw that. 00:40:32.180 --> 00:40:34.270 align:middle line:84% And then when I got my HIV status, 00:40:34.270 --> 00:40:36.490 align:middle line:84% that's why I really got that drive. 00:40:36.490 --> 00:40:38.920 align:middle line:90% It was a way to-- 00:40:38.920 --> 00:40:41.680 align:middle line:84% photographing everything and all my ideas 00:40:41.680 --> 00:40:47.050 align:middle line:84% and was a way to show myself that I was still there. 00:40:47.050 --> 00:40:48.670 align:middle line:90% That my HIV didn't get me. 00:40:48.670 --> 00:40:50.770 align:middle line:84% That it didn't stop me from doing anything. 00:40:50.770 --> 00:40:54.760 align:middle line:84% That if anything, it really kind of fueled my drive 00:40:54.760 --> 00:40:57.400 align:middle line:84% and got me to places I never thought 00:40:57.400 --> 00:41:01.240 align:middle line:90% I would get to before my status. 00:41:01.240 --> 00:41:02.680 align:middle line:90% Right. 00:41:02.680 --> 00:41:05.840 align:middle line:84% So I think it's also interesting looking at these images, 00:41:05.840 --> 00:41:09.380 align:middle line:84% you wouldn't necessarily know that you are HIV positive. 00:41:09.380 --> 00:41:14.770 align:middle line:84% So it's not, it's not an overt part of your image making. 00:41:14.770 --> 00:41:17.590 align:middle line:84% But being ill-- it's an illness, right? 00:41:17.590 --> 00:41:20.890 align:middle line:84% And so, but it's not an illness that's necessarily visible. 00:41:20.890 --> 00:41:24.160 align:middle line:84% And so I think there's a tension between visibility 00:41:24.160 --> 00:41:25.750 align:middle line:90% and invisibility, right? 00:41:25.750 --> 00:41:27.580 align:middle line:84% If you live with an invisible illness. 00:41:27.580 --> 00:41:29.170 align:middle line:84% And so I just wonder if you could 00:41:29.170 --> 00:41:32.710 align:middle line:84% talk about that a little bit-- the fact that you're 00:41:32.710 --> 00:41:34.570 align:middle line:84% trying to make visible the invisible 00:41:34.570 --> 00:41:37.030 align:middle line:90% in your work a little bit. 00:41:37.030 --> 00:41:42.317 align:middle line:84% Yeah, just with my status, obviously, now, 00:41:42.317 --> 00:41:46.210 align:middle line:84% like, my future work, I actually am really 00:41:46.210 --> 00:41:49.610 align:middle line:84% talking more about my status and really focusing on it. 00:41:49.610 --> 00:41:51.940 align:middle line:84% But within my past work, yeah, I never 00:41:51.940 --> 00:41:54.700 align:middle line:84% really mentioned it unless you read my artist's statement 00:41:54.700 --> 00:41:58.293 align:middle line:84% or if you were in a critique with my class and everything. 00:41:58.293 --> 00:42:00.460 align:middle line:84% Because when you look my work, you don't obviously-- 00:42:00.460 --> 00:42:02.530 align:middle line:90% don't automatically see HIV. 00:42:02.530 --> 00:42:05.710 align:middle line:84% It's not like I spell it out and everything. 00:42:05.710 --> 00:42:09.760 align:middle line:84% And so going with my work, my HIV status in my work 00:42:09.760 --> 00:42:15.830 align:middle line:90% was never really the main focus. 00:42:15.830 --> 00:42:19.480 align:middle line:84% It was just a stepping stone for me 00:42:19.480 --> 00:42:23.270 align:middle line:84% to really push myself more out there and push my work. 00:42:23.270 --> 00:42:29.180 align:middle line:84% And so I really, if anything, I just wanted 00:42:29.180 --> 00:42:30.770 align:middle line:84% to start a conversation about it. 00:42:30.770 --> 00:42:33.390 align:middle line:84% And then so if someone saw my work 00:42:33.390 --> 00:42:35.015 align:middle line:84% and want to know more about it, then it 00:42:35.015 --> 00:42:36.080 align:middle line:90% could start a conversation. 00:42:36.080 --> 00:42:37.550 align:middle line:84% And then I could bring up my status 00:42:37.550 --> 00:42:41.450 align:middle line:84% and tell them about where that came from, and making-- 00:42:41.450 --> 00:42:44.900 align:middle line:84% that's in the sense of making the invisible visible for me 00:42:44.900 --> 00:42:47.060 align:middle line:90% in my past work. 00:42:47.060 --> 00:42:49.790 align:middle line:84% Where now, in my future work, I'm really-- 00:42:49.790 --> 00:42:54.320 align:middle line:84% I'm flat-out saying, this is a stigma, this is my status, 00:42:54.320 --> 00:42:56.220 align:middle line:84% and this is what I want talk about 00:42:56.220 --> 00:42:57.710 align:middle line:90% and how I want to discuss it. 00:42:57.710 --> 00:43:03.660 align:middle line:90% 00:43:03.660 --> 00:43:04.620 align:middle line:90% Hi, Eric. 00:43:04.620 --> 00:43:07.740 align:middle line:84% I'm going to read a question from the chat if that's OK. 00:43:07.740 --> 00:43:08.730 align:middle line:90% Oh, yeah. 00:43:08.730 --> 00:43:09.330 align:middle line:90% Yeah. 00:43:09.330 --> 00:43:12.030 align:middle line:84% From Arianna, we have, have you found 00:43:12.030 --> 00:43:15.870 align:middle line:84% that time has helped you connect with yourself 00:43:15.870 --> 00:43:18.270 align:middle line:90% and found more inner love? 00:43:18.270 --> 00:43:21.630 align:middle line:84% I ask since I believe that we should never 00:43:21.630 --> 00:43:24.990 align:middle line:84% stop learning about one's one, especially when it 00:43:24.990 --> 00:43:26.830 align:middle line:90% comes to self-love. 00:43:26.830 --> 00:43:27.330 align:middle line:90% So. 00:43:27.330 --> 00:43:28.950 align:middle line:84% Sorry if I read that kind of fast but-- 00:43:28.950 --> 00:43:29.450 align:middle line:90% [LAUGHS] 00:43:29.450 --> 00:43:31.740 align:middle line:90% No, that's OK. 00:43:31.740 --> 00:43:33.480 align:middle line:84% Yeah, I definitely have found that time 00:43:33.480 --> 00:43:37.725 align:middle line:84% has helped me connect with myself and love myself more. 00:43:37.725 --> 00:43:40.320 align:middle line:90% 00:43:40.320 --> 00:43:44.190 align:middle line:84% Because when I was like-- when you come out as a gay-- 00:43:44.190 --> 00:43:46.332 align:middle line:84% when you come out of the closet and everything, 00:43:46.332 --> 00:43:47.040 align:middle line:90% it's definitely-- 00:43:47.040 --> 00:43:48.623 align:middle line:84% I mean, everyone has their own journey 00:43:48.623 --> 00:43:50.370 align:middle line:90% and has their own experience. 00:43:50.370 --> 00:43:55.110 align:middle line:84% And mine wasn't as dark as some people's have-- 00:43:55.110 --> 00:43:57.270 align:middle line:90% as some people have dealt with. 00:43:57.270 --> 00:44:00.010 align:middle line:84% But there were times where it was hard for me. 00:44:00.010 --> 00:44:04.840 align:middle line:84% And so that shaped the way I saw myself when I was younger. 00:44:04.840 --> 00:44:09.730 align:middle line:84% And as I got older, I started to change things 00:44:09.730 --> 00:44:11.710 align:middle line:84% and think about things differently. 00:44:11.710 --> 00:44:14.830 align:middle line:84% But yeah, definitely, time really 00:44:14.830 --> 00:44:19.730 align:middle line:84% helped me find more of myself and a love for myself, 00:44:19.730 --> 00:44:24.880 align:middle line:84% especially with photography as my way of doing it really 00:44:24.880 --> 00:44:28.750 align:middle line:84% helped me even more find a love for myself I never 00:44:28.750 --> 00:44:29.695 align:middle line:90% thought I could find. 00:44:29.695 --> 00:44:33.490 align:middle line:90% 00:44:33.490 --> 00:44:34.600 align:middle line:90% Beautiful. 00:44:34.600 --> 00:44:37.520 align:middle line:84% So Letty has a comment, question. 00:44:37.520 --> 00:44:39.100 align:middle line:84% She says, I really appreciate how 00:44:39.100 --> 00:44:41.680 align:middle line:84% you honor the intersectionality of your identities 00:44:41.680 --> 00:44:43.510 align:middle line:90% as a Filipino gay man. 00:44:43.510 --> 00:44:45.820 align:middle line:84% Have you always embraced this intersectionality 00:44:45.820 --> 00:44:48.710 align:middle line:90% or was it an evolution for you? 00:44:48.710 --> 00:44:52.380 align:middle line:90% It was an evolution for me. 00:44:52.380 --> 00:44:54.210 align:middle line:90% I mean, I'm always-- 00:44:54.210 --> 00:44:58.350 align:middle line:84% I've never have shied away really of being like-- 00:44:58.350 --> 00:45:00.120 align:middle line:90% I don't know, I've always-- 00:45:00.120 --> 00:45:03.660 align:middle line:84% I never have lied about my being Filipino and everything 00:45:03.660 --> 00:45:06.910 align:middle line:84% or say I'm not Filipino and say I'm something else. 00:45:06.910 --> 00:45:09.070 align:middle line:84% So I've always known I'm Filipino. 00:45:09.070 --> 00:45:10.260 align:middle line:90% I've been Filipino. 00:45:10.260 --> 00:45:13.380 align:middle line:84% But it's really been more recently where I really 00:45:13.380 --> 00:45:16.530 align:middle line:84% started to put those two together and have 00:45:16.530 --> 00:45:22.140 align:middle line:84% those intersect and become like one identity. 00:45:22.140 --> 00:45:23.500 align:middle line:90% And so that's me. 00:45:23.500 --> 00:45:26.340 align:middle line:84% I'm now-- I'm just really starting to explore that now 00:45:26.340 --> 00:45:30.540 align:middle line:90% and see where-- 00:45:30.540 --> 00:45:35.550 align:middle line:84% who I am as, not just a gay man, but a Filipino gay-- queer man. 00:45:35.550 --> 00:45:38.250 align:middle line:84% And what that means to me and what that means to my work 00:45:38.250 --> 00:45:38.760 align:middle line:90% exactly. 00:45:38.760 --> 00:45:41.520 align:middle line:90% And how I want-- 00:45:41.520 --> 00:45:43.965 align:middle line:84% what I want my work to say going forward now. 00:45:43.965 --> 00:45:49.900 align:middle line:90% 00:45:49.900 --> 00:45:52.300 align:middle line:84% I have a question that I'd like to ask, 00:45:52.300 --> 00:45:56.920 align:middle line:84% or well, we like to ask former 性视界 students. 00:45:56.920 --> 00:45:58.510 align:middle line:84% Because, undoubtedly, we will have 00:45:58.510 --> 00:46:04.060 align:middle line:84% a few maybe current students on the call and then potentially 00:46:04.060 --> 00:46:06.850 align:middle line:90% others watching in the future. 00:46:06.850 --> 00:46:10.510 align:middle line:90% Do you have any advice for-- 00:46:10.510 --> 00:46:12.520 align:middle line:84% or do you wish you had some advice when 00:46:12.520 --> 00:46:14.890 align:middle line:84% you were a photo student that you could maybe 00:46:14.890 --> 00:46:18.730 align:middle line:84% impart upon some of the students we have now? 00:46:18.730 --> 00:46:19.690 align:middle line:90% Oh. 00:46:19.690 --> 00:46:21.690 align:middle line:90% Yeah, so I think-- 00:46:21.690 --> 00:46:25.510 align:middle line:84% I don't know, advice that I would have given myself-- 00:46:25.510 --> 00:46:28.030 align:middle line:90% to a young 性视界 Eric-- 00:46:28.030 --> 00:46:37.770 align:middle line:84% would be to really build a connection with your peers 00:46:37.770 --> 00:46:39.780 align:middle line:84% and with your professors and your teachers 00:46:39.780 --> 00:46:42.750 align:middle line:84% and the people who work at 性视界. 00:46:42.750 --> 00:46:44.910 align:middle line:84% Within the photo department, I made 00:46:44.910 --> 00:46:46.410 align:middle line:90% a lot of really great friends. 00:46:46.410 --> 00:46:49.740 align:middle line:84% And I made friends with my peers, 00:46:49.740 --> 00:46:52.560 align:middle line:84% but also friends with my teachers and the staff. 00:46:52.560 --> 00:46:55.920 align:middle line:84% And I really built strong connections. 00:46:55.920 --> 00:46:58.170 align:middle line:90% And I think I would have-- 00:46:58.170 --> 00:47:02.260 align:middle line:84% I wish I had done that more when I was at 性视界. 00:47:02.260 --> 00:47:05.380 align:middle line:84% I had a close-knit group of friends that I stuck with, 00:47:05.380 --> 00:47:09.130 align:middle line:84% but I think you should always really build a connection. 00:47:09.130 --> 00:47:13.910 align:middle line:84% Because I think when it comes to community college, 00:47:13.910 --> 00:47:17.060 align:middle line:84% you come to class, you do what you're supposed to do, 00:47:17.060 --> 00:47:18.440 align:middle line:90% and then you leave. 00:47:18.440 --> 00:47:21.050 align:middle line:84% And for photography in class, I think 00:47:21.050 --> 00:47:22.670 align:middle line:84% it's a little different because you 00:47:22.670 --> 00:47:25.730 align:middle line:84% are forced to do more interactive work with critiques 00:47:25.730 --> 00:47:26.623 align:middle line:90% and everything. 00:47:26.623 --> 00:47:28.790 align:middle line:84% But I definitely would tell people to really start-- 00:47:28.790 --> 00:47:30.050 align:middle line:90% to really build connections. 00:47:30.050 --> 00:47:33.020 align:middle line:84% Because you really don't know, later down the line, what 00:47:33.020 --> 00:47:35.750 align:middle line:90% that connection can do for you. 00:47:35.750 --> 00:47:39.440 align:middle line:90% And also, I think, one of-- 00:47:39.440 --> 00:47:41.570 align:middle line:84% I mean, it took a while for me to get to this idea, 00:47:41.570 --> 00:47:45.060 align:middle line:84% but to really take up every opportunity 00:47:45.060 --> 00:47:48.300 align:middle line:84% and really make use of every opportunity you get. 00:47:48.300 --> 00:47:50.040 align:middle line:84% Even if it's just an assignment, like, 00:47:50.040 --> 00:47:51.810 align:middle line:84% really make use of that assignment. 00:47:51.810 --> 00:47:55.360 align:middle line:84% And do what you have to do to get that grade, 00:47:55.360 --> 00:47:57.453 align:middle line:84% but also push yourself a little more 00:47:57.453 --> 00:47:58.870 align:middle line:84% and to see what else you could do. 00:47:58.870 --> 00:48:03.490 align:middle line:84% Because I've done assignments that I look back at now, 00:48:03.490 --> 00:48:07.940 align:middle line:84% and I now see where I could have gone farther. 00:48:07.940 --> 00:48:10.840 align:middle line:84% And now I've taken that idea and redid it 00:48:10.840 --> 00:48:14.950 align:middle line:84% and seeing how to push it farther now as an older person. 00:48:14.950 --> 00:48:22.694 align:middle line:90% 00:48:22.694 --> 00:48:26.250 align:middle line:84% Eric, and so because today is Worlds AIDS-- 00:48:26.250 --> 00:48:29.520 align:middle line:84% World AIDS Day, can I ask, in your opinion, 00:48:29.520 --> 00:48:31.110 align:middle line:84% does contemporary art have a role 00:48:31.110 --> 00:48:33.517 align:middle line:90% in the field of public health? 00:48:33.517 --> 00:48:34.890 align:middle line:90% Do you think. 00:48:34.890 --> 00:48:36.520 align:middle line:90% Yes, I believe it does. 00:48:36.520 --> 00:48:37.740 align:middle line:90% I think just-- 00:48:37.740 --> 00:48:41.520 align:middle line:90% I mean, since art has ever-- 00:48:41.520 --> 00:48:44.910 align:middle line:84% since the beginning of art and the way art affects people, 00:48:44.910 --> 00:48:46.620 align:middle line:84% it's always been a conversation starter. 00:48:46.620 --> 00:48:51.330 align:middle line:84% Art has always pushed boundaries and pushed narratives 00:48:51.330 --> 00:48:53.490 align:middle line:84% that we wanted to be pushed out there 00:48:53.490 --> 00:48:55.300 align:middle line:90% to really change the world. 00:48:55.300 --> 00:49:00.420 align:middle line:84% So I think art is just such a intelligent way 00:49:00.420 --> 00:49:02.970 align:middle line:84% of getting your point across without having 00:49:02.970 --> 00:49:04.450 align:middle line:90% to say much sometimes. 00:49:04.450 --> 00:49:07.405 align:middle line:84% And so I think it would-- it's really good to have that 00:49:07.405 --> 00:49:09.030 align:middle line:84% in the conversation with public health, 00:49:09.030 --> 00:49:13.875 align:middle line:84% because it can really give people a better idea-- 00:49:13.875 --> 00:49:15.750 align:middle line:84% because you can explain something to someone, 00:49:15.750 --> 00:49:18.390 align:middle line:84% but then sometimes if they see a photo or a drawing 00:49:18.390 --> 00:49:21.570 align:middle line:84% or a painting or a short film about it, 00:49:21.570 --> 00:49:23.530 align:middle line:90% it really sticks with them more. 00:49:23.530 --> 00:49:26.070 align:middle line:84% And so I think art has definitely 00:49:26.070 --> 00:49:28.740 align:middle line:84% a place in-- contemporary art has definitely 00:49:28.740 --> 00:49:31.770 align:middle line:84% a place in the discussion with public health, because it 00:49:31.770 --> 00:49:33.000 align:middle line:90% helps start the discussion. 00:49:33.000 --> 00:49:37.950 align:middle line:84% It helps people confront things, and helps push boundaries 00:49:37.950 --> 00:49:41.880 align:middle line:84% that I know some people are trying to keep up. 00:49:41.880 --> 00:49:48.210 align:middle line:90% 00:49:48.210 --> 00:49:51.440 align:middle line:84% I have a follow-up question to my previous one. 00:49:51.440 --> 00:49:53.960 align:middle line:84% I'm sorry this is a little out of order. 00:49:53.960 --> 00:49:54.920 align:middle line:90% Oh, that's OK. 00:49:54.920 --> 00:50:01.890 align:middle line:84% But do you, in terms of going in the theme of advice for others, 00:50:01.890 --> 00:50:06.230 align:middle line:84% do you possibly have any advice for those who may not 00:50:06.230 --> 00:50:10.580 align:middle line:84% have support from their-- for their families 00:50:10.580 --> 00:50:13.010 align:middle line:84% as they pursue their creative career. 00:50:13.010 --> 00:50:15.387 align:middle line:84% I'm not sure how that would affect you necessarily, 00:50:15.387 --> 00:50:16.970 align:middle line:84% but if there's anything you could say. 00:50:16.970 --> 00:50:19.580 align:middle line:90% 00:50:19.580 --> 00:50:23.060 align:middle line:90% I think if-- yeah, it's-- 00:50:23.060 --> 00:50:26.150 align:middle line:84% I mean, I've always had support by-- from my family. 00:50:26.150 --> 00:50:29.360 align:middle line:84% They've always been super-supportive of my choice 00:50:29.360 --> 00:50:30.510 align:middle line:90% to be a photographer. 00:50:30.510 --> 00:50:33.050 align:middle line:84% And this career path I've chosen. 00:50:33.050 --> 00:50:35.630 align:middle line:84% But I definitely think-- just also, 00:50:35.630 --> 00:50:37.910 align:middle line:84% from my experience as a queer person, 00:50:37.910 --> 00:50:41.600 align:middle line:84% it's also building your own family and your chosen family. 00:50:41.600 --> 00:50:43.430 align:middle line:84% And so building that chosen family 00:50:43.430 --> 00:50:45.170 align:middle line:84% within your peers and your friends 00:50:45.170 --> 00:50:46.940 align:middle line:84% and your professors and the people-- 00:50:46.940 --> 00:50:48.830 align:middle line:84% and your coworkers-- is a great way 00:50:48.830 --> 00:50:51.590 align:middle line:84% to still get that kind of support, 00:50:51.590 --> 00:50:54.290 align:middle line:84% even if it's not from your direct family or your blood 00:50:54.290 --> 00:50:55.187 align:middle line:90% family. 00:50:55.187 --> 00:50:57.020 align:middle line:84% It's your chosen family that can also really 00:50:57.020 --> 00:51:01.338 align:middle line:84% help inspire you and push you farther. 00:51:01.338 --> 00:51:03.130 align:middle line:84% That's a really great way of looking at it. 00:51:03.130 --> 00:51:04.280 align:middle line:90% Thanks. 00:51:04.280 --> 00:51:06.420 align:middle line:90% Welcome. 00:51:06.420 --> 00:51:10.680 align:middle line:84% Eric, you often, obviously, you often work in series. 00:51:10.680 --> 00:51:13.410 align:middle line:84% Can you talk a little bit about why 00:51:13.410 --> 00:51:15.150 align:middle line:90% you prefer working in a series? 00:51:15.150 --> 00:51:17.670 align:middle line:84% And how do you know if something's working? 00:51:17.670 --> 00:51:19.465 align:middle line:90% Yeah. 00:51:19.465 --> 00:51:21.090 align:middle line:84% So, actually, I just had a conversation 00:51:21.090 --> 00:51:24.750 align:middle line:84% with my friend Tony about this, about series work. 00:51:24.750 --> 00:51:26.610 align:middle line:90% How I'm so used-- 00:51:26.610 --> 00:51:29.550 align:middle line:84% one of the big reasons why all my work is always in series 00:51:29.550 --> 00:51:32.760 align:middle line:84% is just because I'm so used to doing a series of work. 00:51:32.760 --> 00:51:36.390 align:middle line:84% It's just the way I've been trained with my photography. 00:51:36.390 --> 00:51:40.448 align:middle line:84% With all my schooling, it's always just been-- 00:51:40.448 --> 00:51:43.978 align:middle line:84% have an idea, create a body of work. 00:51:43.978 --> 00:51:44.770 align:middle line:90% And so that's why-- 00:51:44.770 --> 00:51:45.728 align:middle line:90% I've just been trained. 00:51:45.728 --> 00:51:48.387 align:middle line:84% So all my work is always just a series 00:51:48.387 --> 00:51:49.720 align:middle line:90% because that's what I'm used to. 00:51:49.720 --> 00:51:51.820 align:middle line:84% And I just love creating a series of work. 00:51:51.820 --> 00:51:55.260 align:middle line:84% I'm actually trying to still create series work, 00:51:55.260 --> 00:51:58.950 align:middle line:84% but also just be OK with just doing a one-off photo that 00:51:58.950 --> 00:52:04.390 align:middle line:84% is strong and powerful but doesn't need five more 00:52:04.390 --> 00:52:07.300 align:middle line:84% photos after it to tell more of the story. 00:52:07.300 --> 00:52:12.040 align:middle line:84% But in terms of it working, it's, for me, it 00:52:12.040 --> 00:52:14.380 align:middle line:90% just-- you just keep shooting. 00:52:14.380 --> 00:52:17.350 align:middle line:84% And I always just keep shooting and seeing. 00:52:17.350 --> 00:52:19.940 align:middle line:84% I started doing multiple photos, different styles, 00:52:19.940 --> 00:52:21.820 align:middle line:90% different setups and everything. 00:52:21.820 --> 00:52:26.390 align:middle line:84% And then if I look at it all and I 00:52:26.390 --> 00:52:33.940 align:middle line:84% see that it's not all connecting or if I see that it's not 00:52:33.940 --> 00:52:38.290 align:middle line:84% telling the story I want to do or it's just not 00:52:38.290 --> 00:52:40.335 align:middle line:84% working for me, it just doesn't excite me, 00:52:40.335 --> 00:52:42.460 align:middle line:84% then that's just kind of the way where I feel like, 00:52:42.460 --> 00:52:45.430 align:middle line:90% OK, I can shelf this for now. 00:52:45.430 --> 00:52:49.072 align:middle line:90% Because a lot of times I-- 00:52:49.072 --> 00:52:53.750 align:middle line:84% I rarely just give up on my ideas. 00:52:53.750 --> 00:52:56.600 align:middle line:84% I just usually shelf them and try to go back to it 00:52:56.600 --> 00:52:59.990 align:middle line:84% at a later date, because sometimes I just need my mind 00:52:59.990 --> 00:53:03.780 align:middle line:84% and myself to be in a different part, 00:53:03.780 --> 00:53:05.273 align:middle line:90% like different point in my life. 00:53:05.273 --> 00:53:06.690 align:middle line:84% Then when I look back at it again, 00:53:06.690 --> 00:53:08.010 align:middle line:90% I think, OK, you know what? 00:53:08.010 --> 00:53:11.650 align:middle line:84% I can do this, this way, this time now. 00:53:11.650 --> 00:53:13.650 align:middle line:84% And so it-- just looking back at-- 00:53:13.650 --> 00:53:16.440 align:middle line:84% that's why my love-- that's why I was looking back at past work 00:53:16.440 --> 00:53:18.990 align:middle line:84% because it just--you see things differently now. 00:53:18.990 --> 00:53:23.910 align:middle line:90% 00:53:23.910 --> 00:53:29.730 align:middle line:84% Would you be able to talk about the role of social media 00:53:29.730 --> 00:53:31.440 align:middle line:90% for you as an artist? 00:53:31.440 --> 00:53:33.840 align:middle line:84% How it's a useful tool, potentially. 00:53:33.840 --> 00:53:34.560 align:middle line:90% Yeah. 00:53:34.560 --> 00:53:36.690 align:middle line:90% So social media has like-- 00:53:36.690 --> 00:53:39.420 align:middle line:84% I have grown up with social media. 00:53:39.420 --> 00:53:45.470 align:middle line:84% But being-- using social media and being an artist has-- 00:53:45.470 --> 00:53:47.990 align:middle line:84% it's actually been like a struggle to keep up with it. 00:53:47.990 --> 00:53:50.780 align:middle line:84% Because I definitely-- I have my personal Instagram, 00:53:50.780 --> 00:53:54.030 align:middle line:84% but then I have my photo Instagram. 00:53:54.030 --> 00:53:57.170 align:middle line:84% And so I-- over the past couple of few years now, 00:53:57.170 --> 00:54:03.002 align:middle line:84% I've really started being better at curating stuff for my photo 00:54:03.002 --> 00:54:05.210 align:middle line:84% Instagram, but also just still posting here and there 00:54:05.210 --> 00:54:06.620 align:middle line:90% for my professional. 00:54:06.620 --> 00:54:10.610 align:middle line:90% And it's definitely helped my-- 00:54:10.610 --> 00:54:12.837 align:middle line:84% having an Instagram is really-- or having 00:54:12.837 --> 00:54:14.420 align:middle line:84% my work on social media has definitely 00:54:14.420 --> 00:54:16.700 align:middle line:84% helped give me opportunities that 00:54:16.700 --> 00:54:19.220 align:middle line:84% wouldn't have gotten if I didn't have 00:54:19.220 --> 00:54:20.690 align:middle line:90% social media and everything. 00:54:20.690 --> 00:54:22.730 align:middle line:84% And it just helps me reach out to people. 00:54:22.730 --> 00:54:25.850 align:middle line:84% And people can reach out to me if they find my social media 00:54:25.850 --> 00:54:27.820 align:middle line:84% and everything and find my Instagram. 00:54:27.820 --> 00:54:29.090 align:middle line:90% And they get to see my work. 00:54:29.090 --> 00:54:32.420 align:middle line:84% And it just really helps me connect with other people 00:54:32.420 --> 00:54:33.950 align:middle line:90% and other artists. 00:54:33.950 --> 00:54:36.810 align:middle line:90% So I definitely think-- 00:54:36.810 --> 00:54:39.780 align:middle line:84% I think social media is really great for art and a way 00:54:39.780 --> 00:54:42.210 align:middle line:84% to get your art out there and to build relationships 00:54:42.210 --> 00:54:43.950 align:middle line:90% with people. 00:54:43.950 --> 00:54:46.380 align:middle line:84% I mean, there definitely are flaws with social media. 00:54:46.380 --> 00:54:50.040 align:middle line:84% But I've definitely found a lot of the positives of it. 00:54:50.040 --> 00:54:54.520 align:middle line:90% 00:54:54.520 --> 00:54:58.287 align:middle line:84% So, Eric, I have one more HIV-positive question. 00:54:58.287 --> 00:55:00.870 align:middle line:84% And you kind of touched on this, but I think it's interesting. 00:55:00.870 --> 00:55:05.580 align:middle line:84% How do you balance your own sense of privacy 00:55:05.580 --> 00:55:10.710 align:middle line:84% with a sense of responsibility to visualize 00:55:10.710 --> 00:55:13.020 align:middle line:84% a personal experience but a public health crisis 00:55:13.020 --> 00:55:13.830 align:middle line:90% at the same time? 00:55:13.830 --> 00:55:14.850 align:middle line:90% That's interesting. 00:55:14.850 --> 00:55:18.300 align:middle line:84% How do you-- it sounds like you've come to terms and you 00:55:18.300 --> 00:55:19.500 align:middle line:90% feel more-- 00:55:19.500 --> 00:55:23.740 align:middle line:84% you feel strongly about fighting stigma in your work. 00:55:23.740 --> 00:55:28.130 align:middle line:84% I don't know if you could talk a little bit about that. 00:55:28.130 --> 00:55:29.080 align:middle line:90% I think it was just-- 00:55:29.080 --> 00:55:31.930 align:middle line:90% 00:55:31.930 --> 00:55:34.570 align:middle line:90% like, I was OK for, like-- 00:55:34.570 --> 00:55:37.990 align:middle line:84% I mean, I've been positive now for almost-- 00:55:37.990 --> 00:55:40.450 align:middle line:90% oh my gosh, almost 10 years now. 00:55:40.450 --> 00:55:43.765 align:middle line:84% But in the beginning, or throughout most 00:55:43.765 --> 00:55:47.330 align:middle line:84% of the beginning years, it was just this whole-- 00:55:47.330 --> 00:55:50.030 align:middle line:90% it was like levels of it were-- 00:55:50.030 --> 00:55:53.150 align:middle line:84% I never talked about it at all to I'll talk about it here 00:55:53.150 --> 00:55:58.490 align:middle line:84% and there to this group of people 00:55:58.490 --> 00:56:00.320 align:middle line:84% will all know about it because they're 00:56:00.320 --> 00:56:04.220 align:middle line:84% all in my circle of people who I'm doing work with 00:56:04.220 --> 00:56:05.810 align:middle line:84% or art school with and everything. 00:56:05.810 --> 00:56:09.710 align:middle line:84% To now, it's gotten to a point where what you 00:56:09.710 --> 00:56:13.520 align:middle line:84% said, where I want to give more of a voice and everything 00:56:13.520 --> 00:56:21.800 align:middle line:84% and make use of my platform and really not be silent anymore. 00:56:21.800 --> 00:56:24.830 align:middle line:84% Because I never was super-silent regarding my status. 00:56:24.830 --> 00:56:27.050 align:middle line:84% If someone had asked me, I would tell them. 00:56:27.050 --> 00:56:31.640 align:middle line:84% Or if someone looked at my work and asked me, 00:56:31.640 --> 00:56:34.100 align:middle line:84% I would tell them, yeah, I am HIV positive. 00:56:34.100 --> 00:56:37.520 align:middle line:84% But it's never been something I really blatantly show 00:56:37.520 --> 00:56:38.600 align:middle line:90% off and everything. 00:56:38.600 --> 00:56:43.190 align:middle line:84% But it's definitely been a journey for me 00:56:43.190 --> 00:56:46.280 align:middle line:84% to get to this point where I am really 00:56:46.280 --> 00:56:47.420 align:middle line:90% comfortable with my status. 00:56:47.420 --> 00:56:52.100 align:middle line:84% And-- not just comfortable with my status but talking about it 00:56:52.100 --> 00:56:53.480 align:middle line:90% and wanting to do-- 00:56:53.480 --> 00:56:56.930 align:middle line:84% have it be more on the forefront of my work 00:56:56.930 --> 00:56:59.450 align:middle line:90% and not just in the background. 00:56:59.450 --> 00:57:04.880 align:middle line:90% 00:57:04.880 --> 00:57:06.260 align:middle line:90% Thanks, Eric. 00:57:06.260 --> 00:57:09.290 align:middle line:84% So Roman has a question here in the chat. 00:57:09.290 --> 00:57:10.610 align:middle line:90% Question and comment. 00:57:10.610 --> 00:57:13.400 align:middle line:84% It's interesting how the aesthetic fits or creates 00:57:13.400 --> 00:57:14.630 align:middle line:90% nuance in the work. 00:57:14.630 --> 00:57:17.300 align:middle line:84% The intentional aesthetic you mentioned at SVA 00:57:17.300 --> 00:57:20.030 align:middle line:84% was a queer nightlife aesthetic, which you can see, 00:57:20.030 --> 00:57:22.520 align:middle line:84% but it also gives the nudity a different quality 00:57:22.520 --> 00:57:25.220 align:middle line:84% or maybe creates a different tone. 00:57:25.220 --> 00:57:27.620 align:middle line:84% The newer work without the gels has the same nudity, 00:57:27.620 --> 00:57:29.948 align:middle line:84% but the tone might read differently. 00:57:29.948 --> 00:57:31.490 align:middle line:84% Have you noticed a different response 00:57:31.490 --> 00:57:34.520 align:middle line:84% to the work based on the aesthetic in your older 00:57:34.520 --> 00:57:35.960 align:middle line:90% versus newer work? 00:57:35.960 --> 00:57:38.900 align:middle line:84% And is there a different response to the theatrical 00:57:38.900 --> 00:57:42.680 align:middle line:84% versus more documentary aesthetic or a queer aesthetic? 00:57:42.680 --> 00:57:47.710 align:middle line:90% 00:57:47.710 --> 00:57:51.220 align:middle line:84% I definitely have-- based on just if I'm 00:57:51.220 --> 00:57:54.730 align:middle line:84% looking at a general idea of my work 00:57:54.730 --> 00:57:58.630 align:middle line:84% and if I'm looking at just likes on Instagram about it, 00:57:58.630 --> 00:58:03.460 align:middle line:84% I definitely see that I get more of a response when 00:58:03.460 --> 00:58:08.320 align:middle line:84% it comes to my work that has gels and colors 00:58:08.320 --> 00:58:10.570 align:middle line:90% and just gets more eye catching. 00:58:10.570 --> 00:58:12.947 align:middle line:90% And I guess for people, a lot-- 00:58:12.947 --> 00:58:19.330 align:middle line:84% I don't know, to not make it so [INAUDIBLE] pretty, I guess? 00:58:19.330 --> 00:58:24.810 align:middle line:90% But I also don't-- 00:58:24.810 --> 00:58:29.495 align:middle line:84% I still feel like it's the same kind of work and everything. 00:58:29.495 --> 00:58:31.120 align:middle line:84% It's just that now I just don't-- like, 00:58:31.120 --> 00:58:33.650 align:middle line:84% some work has gels and some work doesn't. 00:58:33.650 --> 00:58:38.180 align:middle line:84% And so I still feel like it's the same kind of idea, 00:58:38.180 --> 00:58:44.070 align:middle line:84% but just without gels-- and without gels and everything. 00:58:44.070 --> 00:58:46.920 align:middle line:84% In response to the theatrical versus documentary 00:58:46.920 --> 00:58:52.090 align:middle line:84% and the queer aesthetic, I definitely-- 00:58:52.090 --> 00:58:54.310 align:middle line:90% the conversation is always-- 00:58:54.310 --> 00:58:56.410 align:middle line:84% the stuff I get is a different conversation 00:58:56.410 --> 00:58:59.170 align:middle line:84% regarding whatever-- if it's a queer aesthetic 00:58:59.170 --> 00:59:01.990 align:middle line:84% or if it's more theatrical or documentary aesthetic. 00:59:01.990 --> 00:59:03.840 align:middle line:84% That's the response that I usually get. 00:59:03.840 --> 00:59:05.590 align:middle line:84% It just-- it's a difference of question, 00:59:05.590 --> 00:59:09.350 align:middle line:84% a different conversation that comes up with it. 00:59:09.350 --> 00:59:12.650 align:middle line:84% So it just depends on what the work is 00:59:12.650 --> 00:59:15.860 align:middle line:84% and that gives off the discussion. 00:59:15.860 --> 00:59:18.500 align:middle line:90% 00:59:18.500 --> 00:59:20.030 align:middle line:90% Thanks for that. 00:59:20.030 --> 00:59:21.162 align:middle line:90% So I'd love to ask-- 00:59:21.162 --> 00:59:22.870 align:middle line:84% you know, it's always interesting to hear 00:59:22.870 --> 00:59:25.970 align:middle line:84% who artists are inspired by, what's exciting them right now. 00:59:25.970 --> 00:59:31.180 align:middle line:84% So I'd love to know any artists or folks whose work you would 00:59:31.180 --> 00:59:33.610 align:middle line:84% recommend to our audience and whose work you'd 00:59:33.610 --> 00:59:34.960 align:middle line:90% like to amplify. 00:59:34.960 --> 00:59:35.620 align:middle line:90% Oh, yeah. 00:59:35.620 --> 00:59:38.230 align:middle line:84% So I definitely thought about this. 00:59:38.230 --> 00:59:41.620 align:middle line:84% So work that artists that really-- 00:59:41.620 --> 00:59:43.600 align:middle line:84% I'll constantly look at or just people 00:59:43.600 --> 00:59:47.500 align:middle line:84% I follow that I think just make really beautiful work. 00:59:47.500 --> 00:59:50.290 align:middle line:84% And one guy, I met him when I lived in New York, 00:59:50.290 --> 00:59:52.720 align:middle line:90% we connected a couple of times. 00:59:52.720 --> 00:59:56.200 align:middle line:84% Pacifico Silano is a really cool queer artist 00:59:56.200 --> 01:00:01.330 align:middle line:84% that does a lot of great archive work with old magazines 01:00:01.330 --> 01:00:04.030 align:middle line:90% and artwork of queer-- 01:00:04.030 --> 01:00:05.890 align:middle line:84% regarding queer people and everything. 01:00:05.890 --> 01:00:08.620 align:middle line:84% And just like the way he puts it together and collages it, 01:00:08.620 --> 01:00:12.030 align:middle line:90% is really beautiful. 01:00:12.030 --> 01:00:16.200 align:middle line:84% Paul Sepuya is also an amazing photographer 01:00:16.200 --> 01:00:18.630 align:middle line:90% that I just love so much. 01:00:18.630 --> 01:00:20.940 align:middle line:84% And his portraits he does, his self-portraits, 01:00:20.940 --> 01:00:23.070 align:middle line:84% are always just so inspiring to me 01:00:23.070 --> 01:00:25.305 align:middle line:84% and really helps inspire my work as well. 01:00:25.305 --> 01:00:28.912 align:middle line:90% 01:00:28.912 --> 01:00:32.100 align:middle line:84% Jason-- I don't know if I pronounce it correctly though. 01:00:32.100 --> 01:00:34.770 align:middle line:90% It was Boeckli. 01:00:34.770 --> 01:00:39.750 align:middle line:84% He does portraits that are really beautiful as well that-- 01:00:39.750 --> 01:00:42.090 align:middle line:90% of queer men. 01:00:42.090 --> 01:00:45.510 align:middle line:84% And so that's another artist that I get 01:00:45.510 --> 01:00:48.050 align:middle line:90% inspired by as another person-- 01:00:48.050 --> 01:00:49.800 align:middle line:84% as a person who also photographs queer men 01:00:49.800 --> 01:00:51.600 align:middle line:84% or photographs myself with queer men. 01:00:51.600 --> 01:00:54.150 align:middle line:84% It's a nice person to connect with. 01:00:54.150 --> 01:00:57.810 align:middle line:84% And one other photographer that I think-- 01:00:57.810 --> 01:01:01.770 align:middle line:84% I met her when I worked in-- or when I went to SVA. 01:01:01.770 --> 01:01:05.370 align:middle line:90% She went with me too. 01:01:05.370 --> 01:01:08.490 align:middle line:84% She is definitely an inspiration, just on-- 01:01:08.490 --> 01:01:11.460 align:middle line:84% inspiration in the sense that she inspires my work, 01:01:11.460 --> 01:01:15.180 align:middle line:84% but inspires me to just go for things and to try it out. 01:01:15.180 --> 01:01:18.980 align:middle line:90% Her name is Sinjun Strom. 01:01:18.980 --> 01:01:22.790 align:middle line:84% She is just an amazing artist all around that-- 01:01:22.790 --> 01:01:24.680 align:middle line:84% if you foll-- like, you should all 01:01:24.680 --> 01:01:27.140 align:middle line:84% follow her if you ever want to be inspired by work 01:01:27.140 --> 01:01:31.400 align:middle line:84% and inspired by someone's drive to create work and everything. 01:01:31.400 --> 01:01:33.705 align:middle line:84% She is also a big person I look up to. 01:01:33.705 --> 01:01:35.330 align:middle line:84% And I talk to her every once in a while 01:01:35.330 --> 01:01:39.350 align:middle line:84% to really just help refocus myself in my work 01:01:39.350 --> 01:01:41.308 align:middle line:90% and find balance. 01:01:41.308 --> 01:01:43.100 align:middle line:84% Because I think she's a really great person 01:01:43.100 --> 01:01:45.500 align:middle line:90% to talk to and look at. 01:01:45.500 --> 01:01:48.350 align:middle line:84% Because just of-- the kind of work 01:01:48.350 --> 01:01:50.630 align:middle line:84% she creates and the stuff she does 01:01:50.630 --> 01:01:53.240 align:middle line:84% to make that work is really beautiful. 01:01:53.240 --> 01:01:58.980 align:middle line:90% 01:01:58.980 --> 01:01:59.480 align:middle line:90% Right. 01:01:59.480 --> 01:02:00.440 align:middle line:90% Thank you. 01:02:00.440 --> 01:02:02.570 align:middle line:84% Roman's putting links in the chat 01:02:02.570 --> 01:02:07.820 align:middle line:84% when we're able to find website or Instagram definitely. 01:02:07.820 --> 01:02:10.520 align:middle line:84% So we'll share that with all of you today, 01:02:10.520 --> 01:02:12.830 align:middle line:84% and we'll also share it in a follow up email. 01:02:12.830 --> 01:02:16.250 align:middle line:84% OK, yeah, Roman just found a Sinjun. 01:02:16.250 --> 01:02:17.690 align:middle line:90% That was Strom I see. 01:02:17.690 --> 01:02:18.470 align:middle line:90% OK. 01:02:18.470 --> 01:02:19.610 align:middle line:90% Oh, yeah, Strom. 01:02:19.610 --> 01:02:20.750 align:middle line:90% All right. 01:02:20.750 --> 01:02:24.410 align:middle line:84% And then Jason [INAUDIBLE] we think. 01:02:24.410 --> 01:02:26.600 align:middle line:90% We might need spelling on that. 01:02:26.600 --> 01:02:31.890 align:middle line:90% His last name is B-O-E-C-K-L-I. 01:02:31.890 --> 01:02:32.390 align:middle line:90% OK. 01:02:32.390 --> 01:02:32.900 align:middle line:90% Got it. 01:02:32.900 --> 01:02:35.520 align:middle line:90% 01:02:35.520 --> 01:02:36.020 align:middle line:90% Cool. 01:02:36.020 --> 01:02:36.520 align:middle line:90% Great. 01:02:36.520 --> 01:02:38.580 align:middle line:90% We'll share that. 01:02:38.580 --> 01:02:40.850 align:middle line:90% Well, thank you so much, Eric. 01:02:40.850 --> 01:02:43.670 align:middle line:84% Last call for questions for Eric. 01:02:43.670 --> 01:02:48.690 align:middle line:84% Definitely raise your hand or unmute or throw it in the chat. 01:02:48.690 --> 01:02:50.050 align:middle line:90% But I really want to thank you. 01:02:50.050 --> 01:02:53.120 align:middle line:84% I'm so excited to have you here as an alum of Student 01:02:53.120 --> 01:02:55.370 align:middle line:90% Invitational of 性视界. 01:02:55.370 --> 01:02:56.510 align:middle line:90% Really fantastic. 01:02:56.510 --> 01:02:58.010 align:middle line:84% So we love seeing where you're going 01:02:58.010 --> 01:03:01.490 align:middle line:84% and can't wait to hear where you land next-- 01:03:01.490 --> 01:03:06.000 align:middle line:84% and continued flag work, potentially. 01:03:06.000 --> 01:03:06.500 align:middle line:90% Yes. 01:03:06.500 --> 01:03:07.500 align:middle line:90% [LAUGHS] 01:03:07.500 --> 01:03:08.460 align:middle line:90% Seeing that. 01:03:08.460 --> 01:03:08.960 align:middle line:90% Oh, good. 01:03:08.960 --> 01:03:09.460 align:middle line:90% OK. 01:03:09.460 --> 01:03:11.600 align:middle line:90% Ramon found that. 01:03:11.600 --> 01:03:14.810 align:middle line:84% And then Roman also did include a quick-- 01:03:14.810 --> 01:03:17.550 align:middle line:84% or a link to a very quick two-minute survey. 01:03:17.550 --> 01:03:19.140 align:middle line:90% We'd love to get your feedback. 01:03:19.140 --> 01:03:20.850 align:middle line:84% It helps us to plan for the future. 01:03:20.850 --> 01:03:23.390 align:middle line:84% So we really appreciate you all taking a moment 01:03:23.390 --> 01:03:24.950 align:middle line:90% to do that if you would. 01:03:24.950 --> 01:03:27.390 align:middle line:84% But, Eric, thrilled to have you here. 01:03:27.390 --> 01:03:30.020 align:middle line:84% Thank you so much for your time and energy. 01:03:30.020 --> 01:03:32.840 align:middle line:84% And we appreciate all of you who took time out of your day 01:03:32.840 --> 01:03:34.980 align:middle line:90% to be with us here. 01:03:34.980 --> 01:03:36.150 align:middle line:90% Thank you so much. 01:03:36.150 --> 01:03:37.100 align:middle line:90% Please take care. 01:03:37.100 --> 01:03:39.060 align:middle line:90% Stay safe and healthy. 01:03:39.060 --> 01:03:40.380 align:middle line:90% Thank you so much, everyone. 01:03:40.380 --> 01:03:40.880 align:middle line:90% Thank you. 01:03:40.880 --> 01:03:43.410 align:middle line:90% 01:03:43.410 --> 01:03:48.480 align:middle line:84% Visit us at www.chaffey.edu/wignall 01:03:48.480 --> 01:03:51.510 align:middle line:84% to access our full schedule of programs and our available 01:03:51.510 --> 01:03:52.780 align:middle line:90% recordings. 01:03:52.780 --> 01:03:54.903 align:middle line:90% Thank you for joining us. 01:03:54.903 --> 01:03:59.010 align:middle line:90% [SYNTHESIZED CHIMES] 01:03:59.010 --> 01:04:06.000 align:middle line:90%